COB RTC David Miscavige is Missing! Part 3


The impatient Scientology Private Investigators were at their wits end: COB RTC  David Miscavige had gone missing without a trace in a very dark bathroom inside of the Ideal Org in Los Angeles.

The PI’s summoned Old Ned, the janitor.

Old Ned had once been a Scientology executive way back in the old days when Scientologists smoked Kool cigarettes, used real soup cans on their e-meters, and were loosey goosey about Out 2D sits.

Scientology 1970: Hows ’bout we go back to my place and co-audit?

Old Ned had been busted a long time ago and placed into the Perpetual RPF. He stayed because his son was also in the Sea Org and Old Ned wanted to be close to him.


Without telling Old Ned that COB was missing, the impatient PI’s asked Old Ned how a person could disappear in the restroom.

Old Ned walked to the one stall in the very dark restroom, opened the door, and pointed to an old window that had been painted over twenty years ago:


The PI’s had somehow missed the old window, probably because it blended into the darkness like everything else in the dirty restroom.

One of the PI’s shined his flashlight on the window and saw fresh fingernail marks on the glass. There were also new tears in the old paint showing that the window had recently been opened.

The PI’s rushed outside to see what was on the other side of the window.

5 replies »

  1. I thought he was in North Korea? OT8, maybe the Super Powers building malfunctioned–the anti-gravity room actually became a vacuum, wherein Davey disappeared. Or maybe he melted, like Margaret Hamilton in The Wizard of Oz.


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