“Sometimes it takes a secret agent to catch a secret agent,” declared Tom Cruise a/k/a Ethan Hunt during a press conference held at Scientology Media Productions in Hollywood. Cruise, 60, displayed Elon […]
Exposed! Danny Masterson’s Attorney Phillip Cohen Revealed to be Aleister Crowley in Disguise!
The media was shocked to learn that Danny Masterson’s criminal defense attorney is actually the nefarious occultist Aleister Crowley. “The Dark Lords who controlled L. Ron Hubbard, and now control David Miscavige, […]
Begone Xenu! David Miscavige and Tom Cruise Lead 120 Million Scientologists in Postulating Away All Entheta & Black PR!
Assembled in the Great Hall of Exact Data in Clearwater, Florida, Scientology ecclesiastical leader David Miscavige and Tom Cruise lead 120 million Scientologists in postulating away all entheta and Black PR which […]
David Miscavige’s Enormous Sisyphean Labors
Due to the constant and enormous shitstorms which occur daily in the Church of Scientology, David Miscavige is doomed to an eternity of pushing giant rolls of toilet paper uphill each day […]
Scientology: “Mr. Miscavige fully cooperated with the authorities in Los Angeles!”
“We in the Church of Scientology wish to emphasize that Mr. Miscavige fully cooperated with the authorities in Los Angeles,” stated Janet Weiland of Scientology’s Office of Special Affairs in Hollywood. “There […]
Why Does Scientology Paid Apologist Massimo Introvigne Sleep in a Coffin?
“People have asked we in Scientology why our paid apologist Massimo Introvigne sleeps in an open coffin located in the CESNUR library,” Church spokesman Ken Delusion noted in response to questions. “Massimo […]
David Miscavige Bans Mike Rinder’s New Book from all Scientology Ideal Orgs, Implanting Stations, Stars, Moons, Planets, and Galaxies in Perpetuity
Scientology ecclesiastical leader David Miscavige has banned Mike Rinder’s book new from all Scientology Ideal Orgs, Implanting Stations, Stars, Moons, Planets, and Galaxies. Scientologists are not allowed to click the link to […]