J. R. “Bob” Dobbs has been selected to take over as the Pope of Scientology following David Miscavige’s sudden and unexplained departure to Bulgravia. Dobbs said his immediate plans were for Scientology […]
And the winner for Best Cult is Scientology… no wait… the winner is, sorry, sorry, there’s been a mix up. The winner for Best Cult is Heaven’s Gate. Sorry David Miscavige and […]
“What is your diagnosis Doctor?” queried Ken Delusion, “Has David Miscavige’s angry penis infection cleared up?” “No it has not,” replied Scientology Dr. Donald Wildebeest “And yet I’ve repeatedly warned COB that […]
After an intense 48 hour manhunt and dragnet conducted by over 1,200 members of Scientology’s security forces, it has been determined that Tony Ortega was not in Clearwater. Nevertheless, the threat of […]
All Scientologists are like Schrödinger’s cat in the box: They are simultaneously in good standing and not in good standing with the Church. If a radioactive legal particle adverse to the Church […]
What are we to make of Scientologist Joy Villa’s Trump dress that she wore on the Grammy red carpet? COB RTC Mr. David Miscavige, the top technical terminal in Scientology, said the […]
“The Church of Scientology today agreed to use its upper level technology to help Jesus defeat Satan once and for all,” announced spokesman Ken Delusion. “Our work to end the endless Manichaeism […]
Scientology leader David Miscavige is the greatest spiritual leader in history. He is greater than Jesus, Buddha, etc.
So many Scientologists wish they had served with the Founder aboard the Flagship Apollo. One of the most celebrated ecclesiastical ceremonies aboard the Apollo was to be overboarded, i.e. seized and thrown […]
OTVIIIisGrrr8! 