“The new Scientology Danger Process calls for Scientologists to hang upside down for twelve hours over the 110 freeway in Downtown Los Angeles while suspended from a rope,” said Church spokesman Ken […]
OMFG!!! GLOBAL WARNING TO ALL SCIENTOLOGISTS!!! HILL 10 FLAPPING FLAP!!! DANGER!!!
The death-like quietude of Downtown Clearwater was shattered yesterday afternoon when a Wholetrack SP Psych Implanter was spotted seated on a park bench in a community park owned by we in the […]
HowdyCon 2018 Declared an Illegal Criminal Assembly
Captain Ken Delusion, Inspector General of the Religious Technology Center today pronounced HowdyCon 2018 an illegal criminal assembly. “All HowdyCon attendees are hereby declared 47XSP’s which is the new RTC standard of […]
David Miscavige Master Class Announced on Facebook
Have you ever wanted to be wealthy, violent, and insane cult leader? Well now the Pompadoured Pontiff David Miscavige teaches you all of his secrets in a new Master Class series. Here’s […]
Scientology Butthurt Cream: For Pain Levels of 2.0 or Greater!
Scientology Butthurt Cream is indicated for butthurt pain levels of 2.0 or greater. What are some examples of when a Scientologist needs to use Scientology Butthurt Cream? Below are three scenarios: Scenario […]
John Travolta Confused, Upset as Gotti Bombs. Scientology Actor Blames the Psychs.
WTF? Where is everybody? The theatre is empty on the opening weekend of Gotti. This is the pic I slaved ten years to get on the screen! I betcha all of you […]
Travolta Marathon on Scientology TV This Weekend!
“Widely savaged by wog film critics as the worst mobster film ever, John Travolta’s Gotti has been yanked from theaters and will be released tomorrow on Scientology TV,” announced Ken Delusion, the […]
Xenu’s Criminal Associate Arrested
“Spacelord Xenu’s long-time criminal associate Darth Vader was arrested and taken into custody at the Scientology World Fair in Hemet,” announced International Justice Chief Mr. Ken Delusion. “Vader was spotted in the […]
Scientology Uber Driver Issues Tone 40 Commands
The trained Scientologist never Q&A’s with the reactive mind of a wog. Here we see GAT II trained Scientologist and OTVII Ted Malinowski repeating the command to a stupid wog. In doing […]