US Congressman George Santos said it was actually him who defeated Spacelord Xenu in an epic battle 75 million years ago on the planet Coltus which is 185 billion light years from […]
“Scientology is not sinking,” explained Scientologist Barry Minkcough of Passaic, New Jersey. “Despite appearances to the contrary, Captain David Miscavige simply ordered a huge amount of ballast water pumped to the bow […]
A recent survey indicated that Scientology and Satanism are tied for being the most popular religions. We in Scientology wish to point out that a person can be both a Scientologist and […]
We in RTC wish to point out that this is how Vladimir Putin handles Suppressive Persons. This clearly proves that Scientology is not as bad as Russia. Sure, some people in Scientology […]
“Due to the global electronics shortage, we in Scientology are facing a 208-week backorder on repair components for our 21-year-old fleet of Ultra Mark VII e-meters,” said Ricky Rockslammer of Golden Era […]
“Sometimes it takes a secret agent to catch a secret agent,” declared Tom Cruise a/k/a Ethan Hunt during a press conference held at Scientology Media Productions in Hollywood. Cruise, 60, displayed Elon […]
The media was shocked to learn that Danny Masterson’s criminal defense attorney is actually the nefarious occultist Aleister Crowley. “The Dark Lords who controlled L. Ron Hubbard, and now control David Miscavige, […]
Assembled in the Great Hall of Exact Data in Clearwater, Florida, Scientology ecclesiastical leader David Miscavige and Tom Cruise lead 120 million Scientologists in postulating away all entheta and Black PR which […]
Due to the constant and enormous shitstorms which occur daily in the Church of Scientology, David Miscavige is doomed to an eternity of pushing giant rolls of toilet paper uphill each day […]
“We in the Church of Scientology wish to emphasize that Mr. Miscavige fully cooperated with the authorities in Los Angeles,” stated Janet Weiland of Scientology’s Office of Special Affairs in Hollywood. “There […]
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