Tom Cruise was AWOL from the Oscars as he was needed elsewhere to protect the Earth from a threatened alien invasion. “We in Scientology Intelligence received a credible report that the Fifth […]
Who’s laughing now Mr. Joke Man? While out to get coffee, comedian Trey Southpark suddenly found himself trapped in his Porsche on Interstate 5 during the massive rainstorms here in Los Angeles. […]
“Disgusted with the lack of praise, applause, acknowledgement, and heroism medals due him, David Miscavige resigned his office as COB RTC this morning at 0900 hours local time Hollywood, California,” announced Church […]
COB RTC Mr. David Miscavige officially denied Scientology to the entire world after a wog court declared him served in a lawsuit. “The world will now get to see just how quickly […]
US Congressman George Santos said it was actually him who defeated Spacelord Xenu in an epic battle 75 million years ago on the planet Coltus which is 185 billion light years from […]
“Scientology is not sinking,” explained Scientologist Barry Minkcough of Passaic, New Jersey. “Despite appearances to the contrary, Captain David Miscavige simply ordered a huge amount of ballast water pumped to the bow […]
A recent survey indicated that Scientology and Satanism are tied for being the most popular religions. We in Scientology wish to point out that a person can be both a Scientologist and […]
We in RTC wish to point out that this is how Vladimir Putin handles Suppressive Persons. This clearly proves that Scientology is not as bad as Russia. Sure, some people in Scientology […]
Brawny Toilet Paper Lumberjack Finally Gets His Big Break; Appears in Same Ad Space as Tom Cruise. After decades of hard work as the Brawny Toilet Paper Lumberjack, Scientologist Brad Whypingass of […]
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