“And now you know the rest of the story.” explained Church spokesman Ken Delusion. “Project Mouse Table was needed for COB to actually write down the numbers involved in OTIX and OTX, […]
The Release of OTIX and OTX Announced!
Overwhelming Demand Forces Scientology to Increase Yearly Events!
Due to the BILLIONS of people clamoring for more Scientology events, the Church of Scientology will increase its number of annual events, this according to Church spokesman Ken Delusion. “The Church presently […]
Super Power: Did You Feel That?
“This Super Power testimonial is in no way Cultic,” declared Church of Scientology spokesman Ken Delusion. “People speak and act like this all the time after doing Super Power.”
Church of Scientology to Implant Members
“As part of GAT II, COB RTC David Miscavige has ordered all Church of Scientology parishioners to be implanted with a special RFID (NSA grade) chip that will track their movements and […]
Office of Special Affairs Targets Orange County, California
Acting upon secret orders from Captain David Miscavige, shock squads from the Church of Scientology’s Office of Special Affairs moved quickly under the cover of darkness. OSA agents fanned out across South […]
Church of Scientology to Launch of Super Power & GAT II via Skype
Church of Scientology spokesman Ken Delusion today announced that the Church will create history when it becomes the first major religion to globally launch new religious technology via Skype. “This will be […]
Church of Scientology to Tear Down New Flag Building
We in RTC wish to assure the general public that COB RTC David Miscavige is firmly in charge of the Church of Scientology and has a definite plan for Planetary Clearing. These […]
COB RTC David Miscavige is Missing! Part 5
XXII Scientology attorney Rick Moxon and his cadre of PI’s took off from Hollywood Boulevard in RTC Viper 1, a specially equipped flying car used in the pursuit and apprehension of blown […]
COB RTC David Miscavige is Missing! Part 4
XVIII Outside the window the impatient Scientology PI’s inspected the dirt planter and found fresh footrprints. Kneeling to inspect them with his large magnifying glass, the lead PI exclaimed, “Elevator shoes. Bingo!” […]
COB RTC David Miscavige is Missing! Part 3
XVI The impatient Scientology Private Investigators were at their wits end: COB RTC David Miscavige had gone missing without a trace in a very dark bathroom inside of the Ideal Org in […]
OTVIIIisGrrr8! 