“Scientology leader David Miscavige stole a pig from a local farm today and is believed headed south towards Mexico.” said Sheriff Ned Forotees of Hemet. “Mr. MIscavige was carrying a backpack stuffed […]
Wog doctors don’t know anything about OT phenomena. A Scientologist onboard the MV Freewinds recently turned on the measles during her auditing session. However, this case of measles was from a lifetime […]
“Social welfare programs that give billions of dollars to poor people are bigoted and hateful because they discriminate against Scientologists,” declared the new STAND League Executive Director Mr. Ken Delusion. “For too […]
Executed in 1841 for a decade-long crime spree which included pushing seventy people to their deaths from the heights of the Aqueduto das Águas Livres (Aqueduct of the Free Waters), the severed […]
We in the Scientology Office of Special Affairs have disguised our low IQ colleague Ed Parkin as Mr. Peanut. We have done this because the real Mr. Peanut attacked the Church of […]
“Our forces now own Downtown Clearwater!” enthused Scientology Land Führer Hermann Eichmann. “We will next proceed to sweep Clearwater clean of all SP’s!”
We in Scientology wish to apologize for any misunderstanding over the installation of our kiosk in the public lobby of the LAPD Hollywood Division station house. What was supposed to have been […]
