Well hello there Scientologist!
With spring just around the corner it’s time to do our annual spring cleaning.
We begin by throwing out all of those old and unreliable Quantum meters that are now illegal and hence criminal.
The new meter is 50,000x more sensitive and so why would anyone want those lackluster old Quantum’s? Throw ’em out onto the garbage pile with any of the Founder’s old books printed before 2007.
And now onto the more important topic: COB wants every Scientologist to know that it’s time to pull up your socks!
I’ll repeat the command: It’s time to pull up your socks!
COB is doggone sick and tired of all the defeatist natter in the Church. Not one single day goes by lately that Ethics isn’t handling natterers, or worse, Scientologists who are forwarding enemy lines and spreading defeatism.
Why to hear some Scientologists talk, you’d think the Church of Scientology was on its last legs breathing from an oxygen bottle in some wog hospital room.
Well folks, I’m here to tell you that these nervous nellies are about to get a serious reality adjustment because COB has had it with pandering to a bunch of out ethics Scientologists who read the internet, get themselves all enturbulated, and then call everyone about “COB this” or “COB that” and whine about hard and unfair the Church is!
What a load of crap! I’m sick of it and so is COB! Time for some good ol’ RTC ecclesiastical beatings I say! If someone won’t pull up their socks why then *POW!* right in the kisser next time they natter or read entheta online!
So pull up your socks or else!