“Cash is trash,” declared Scientology money hygiene expert Ken Delusion. “Cash is so very dangerous and contaminated these days that it can literally kill you on contact.” “For this reason, we in […]
Q: How does a Psych capture a mighty thetan like Tom Cruise? A: Space Secret Psych Implanter Elon Musk has lured Tom Cruise into a trap by offering him a ride into […]
COB RTC Mr. David Miscavige received a $5 million dollar solid gold toilet from the Sea Org as an acknowledgement of all that he has done for the Church of Scientology. Mr. […]
US Navy F-18 Super Hornets tracked a mysterious UFO recently. A follow up investigation determined that the aerial vehicle was Scientology leader David Miscavige fleeing the service of subpoena in several cases […]
With Kim Jong Un dead or nearly dead as reported, Scientology Chairman David Miscavige today announced that he is ready to take over North Korea. “My decades of leading Scientologists into crushing […]
Grant Cardone revealed today in an Instagram video that he has long been the leader of a secret Martian Sex Cult. “I have my 10x Martian sex slave bitches serving me hourly,” […]
“The UN has hired Mr. David Miscavige to solve the world’s economic disaster,” said Scientology spokesperson Ken Delusion. “Mr. Miscavige has outlined his seven point plan using LRH business technology to implement […]
It is a proven fact that only Scientology can help you. Vaccines are full of deadly dead viruses and are designed by the Communist-Chinese-controlled World Health Organization to kill everyone in the […]
Sporting a new Donald Trump coiffure and 30 extra pounds from “shelter in place” binge eating while watching Netflix, Scientology leader David Miscavige announced today that he is asking the US Federal […]
While he was on a secret trip to Macau to handle a very urgent and highly-secretive Scientology financial matter, the Chinese government today arrested ecclesiastical leader David Miscavige. The Chinese authorities charged […]
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