Secret Psych Implanter Elon Musk Lures Tom Cruise into a Space Trap!

Q: How does a Psych capture a mighty thetan like Tom Cruise?

A: Space

Secret Psych Implanter Elon Musk has lured Tom Cruise into a trap by offering him a ride into space on a Space X rocket.

We in RTC have warned Tom Cruise that he is walking into a trap.

Once Tom steps aboard a Space X rocket he will be whisked to a strange planet at Warp 10X. There he will be implanted to believe in Psych drugs and vaccines as the answer.

For his own safety, Scientology ecclesiastical leader Mr. David Miscavige has ordered Tom Cruise locked away in the same prison religious compound as Shelly.

2 replies »

  1. “Elon Musk’s” real name is of course ¥Æ-Øç¥-J0§ which is the serial number assigned to him in the cloning tanks on the alien psych planet Farsec. His mission on Teegeeack required considerable planning to establish a false human identity. This was achieved by him using a small amount of superior alien technology to appear commercially successful.

    Once Mr Cruise has been captured and sent for implanting, “Musk” will claim to be building a deep space rescue submarine and this dastardly plot will be successfully completed and Mr Cruise returned apparently unharmed and become an salesman for vaccine electroshock machines.


    • How is it that you know so many very particular and specific details Andrew? Are you actually a Space Admiral from Farsec? We in RTC will be watching you and your covert interstellar activities.


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