Internet Reputation Management Firm to Help Church of Scientology’s Reputation!

Crisis management expert Mike Sitrick is just one man, and a wog at that.

Mike cannot possibly do enough to help stop the “Onslaught of Entheta” being directed at the Church of Scientology by the internet. For this reason, we in RTC felt a sense of relief and hope when we received this e-mail today:

Hi,

Greetings of the day!

Is Google Showing Scandalous Results against you?

Are you facing recession for you or your online business?

If your answer is “YES”, undoubtedly it is just because of complaints being shown in Google against you.

If you want to fix all such issues, our unparalleled service is the ultimate solution for you.

Reasons:

– The time others NEED to show you working results, we need THAT TIME to FINISH your Project.

– Just in 7 days, you will be seeing plenty of positive results in top 20 positions of Google.

– Wallet-Friendly Service.

– Many celebrities, politicos & business professionals adorn the list of our clients.

If our service appeals you, reply us right away as our experts are waiting for your response.

Regards,

XXXXX

We had Ken Delusion reply immediately:

Dear XXXXX,

We are so glad you reached out to us.

Google is indeed showing scandalous results against us!

We are a prominent religious group. Factually speaking, we are the most ethical group on the planet.

Our members include movie stars and captains of industry.

We are having problems online. It seems that a tiny handful of our former members — and they are all bitter defrocked apostates — attack us online constantly!

There are also a few people out there, perhaps six or seven people, who post phony stories online about us. These phony stories claim all sorts of nonsense that is not true.

Money is no object.

We need our reputation defended and repaired immediately if not sooner!

Please contact us right away!

Yours,

Mr. Ken Delusion
International Spokesperson

We in RTC will let our millions and millions of readers know how this cycle turns out.

12 responses to “Internet Reputation Management Firm to Help Church of Scientology’s Reputation!

  1. Wogs truly suck at everything. I suggest everyone ignore the entheta, avoid the internet at all costs and enroll on new Majestic Objectives, that every still living OT VIII is raving about! Win after win after win!!!

    Like

    • That’s what I’ve been saying for the last 76 trillion years! Wogs Suck! Thanks dodo I feel totally and completely validated after reading your post!

      Like

      • Dear Wogs Suck,
        Yes, my pleasure. The truth can penetrate the steel of tanks, my friend.
        Hopefully wogs will learn one day, for Xenu’s sake. Or Ron’s reputation.
        ML, Dodo.

        Like

  2. If a certain R6 implant can create a world in six days, a wog PR firm should be able to fix Scientology’s internet problem in seven. Go for it, I’ll check back in a week.

    Like

  3. Control over MEST…handled through OTVIII technology.

    Control over internet entheta…outsourced to WOG consultant.

    Dark days my friend….dark days indeed.

    Could it be the tech did not foresee the development of internet entheta or worse foresaw it, but is unable to handle it?

    The rising levels of cognitive dissonance lurk under the surface, hidden like a tsunami on the horizon which is edging ever closer to sweeping away our carefully managed view of reality.

    With no social media footprint with which to fight back and no iPhone or Android apps to support our publics, our position appears untenable.

    Succor for the troops?

    Like

    • Whostolemycog: You appear to have gone into a Suppressive agreement with Anonymous that the Church has no Tech to handle the internet. This is not true.

      What is true is that Scientology has the exact technology needed to handle entheta in any form from a mass Marcab landing to the Internet to swarms of locusts or other forms of biblical pestilence.

      We can handle it all but would rather busy ourselves Clearing the Planet and building new Ideal Orgs,.

      Like

  4. But OT8, your growth has been straight up and vertical.

    Like

  5. Internet ‘reputation repair’, like credit repair is a scam. You can hire all the trolls you want and get them to praise your service/ethics/customer experience until the cows come home, but no one with any brains is going to believe it. Now this may play into your hands just right, do you want educated intelligent consumers?? Of course not, you want consumers who follow orders and conform to your ‘tech’. You need people like this…..

    Like

  6. Why don’y you all just join the Freezoners, who don’t have an image problem.

    Like

  7. There’s that but Atheists throw better parties.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s