COB RTC David Miscavige Reaches Astonishing News Heights in Hair!

We in RTC hinted about it several weeks ago at Tony Ortega’s criminally suppressive blog.

Someone at that blog posted a photo of Michael Douglas as Liberace.

We knew that this would be a hot new “NOW!” look for COB RTC David Miscavige and so we, yes, photoshopped it because we are RTC and can do anything we please:

COBliberace

And then at the Grand Opening of the Ideal Org it was like POW! when COB powered out in full airbrushed glory sporting his astonishing new ultra-high Liberace hair and sea foam green necktie!

COB.Hair.Portland

Not quite a pompadour, COB’s daring new coiffure is so Theta, so bold, and so modern, but then again we in RTC should not be surprised by the boldness of COB in seizing either the moment or the money!

COB has certainly come such a long way from the old days when he had a squeaky voice, horrible clothes, chronic bad breath, and flat hair.

Make COB’s coiffure yours today! For only $1995 Flag Land Base hair professionals will give you the “COB Updo” along with highlights and tinting!

11 responses to “COB RTC David Miscavige Reaches Astonishing News Heights in Hair!

  1. With this spiffy new updo, and his much improved grooming, COB would fit right in at the Silverado. That is, assuming he could fight his way through the remnants of the 25,000,000 who attended the Portland Ideal Org Opening, and who are even now milling about hopefully, postulating his return.

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    • COB stayed behind in Portland for a few days so he could show his friends at the Silverado his sassy new Summer look:

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      • Always the trendsetter. DM helps bring back the “murse.” Wonder what he feels the need to carry in there that the Sea Org minions wouldn’t be trusted to carry with him. It’s not like Queen Elizabeth, who always has a purse color-coordinated with her shoes and hat, from whom she has been seen to remove lipstick or a hankie. DM’s “murse” appears to be way too full for lipstick and a hankie in this photo.

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      • I hope you weren’t using the same photoshop editor you used in Portland.

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  2. Does $1995 include a 55 gal. bucket of Brylcreem?

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    • You ask an excellent question, for naturally anyone with a power COB haircut can and should be very concerned with maintenance.

      COB would never use a common wog pomade such as Byrlcreem, particularly when he has a steady supply of a hair dressing obtained from mink organs. To this point, and to underscore the phenomenal commitment it takes to wear and properly maintain a COB power updo, COB Mink Oil Pomade is now available exclusively at all Ideal Org gas stations and wherever e-meters are sold.

      So yes, the $1995 “COB Special” does not include hair products, however, a maintenance contract is available whereby one comes in once a week to their nearest Ideal Org Hair Salon for a touch up and a sec check.

      COB Oil Mink Pomade, only $1995 for a one month supply. And when you purchase mink pomade using your Ideal Org Gas Station credit card, you earn free points towards your next IAS status!

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  3. “Ideal Org Hair Salon”, Supercuts with a detention center in the back.. I loved COB in the Liberace suit. He just sparkles…..

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  4. Hey Wog!

    Be the first on your block to get COB’s Highly Deluxe Gentleman’s Hair Pomade with mink oil!

    COB’s Highly Deluxe Gentleman’s Hair Pomade: For Hair You Can Have!

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