We in the RTC Department of Social Media Policing saw this post from Betsy at the LA Org posted on an enemy blog: NO BETSY NO! Scientology is never to be used […]
The Leaning Scientology Ideal Org of The Valley

“Pictures don’t lie,” said Valley Ideal Org Executive Director Ken Delusion. “Our Org is leaning. The entire building slopes towards Burbank Blvd. “This sloping of the building interfered with yesterday’s meeting of […]
Scientology in a Crisis of Excess Carpeting & Floor Space

“Scientology’s straight up and vertical expansion over the years has created a crisis of excess carpeting and floor space,” declared ED Daphne Dimwit of the San Fernando Valley Ideal Org. “The carpet […]
Scientology Butthurt Cream: For Pain Levels of 2.0 or Greater!

Scientology Butthurt Cream is indicated for butthurt pain levels of 2.0 or greater. What are some examples of when a Scientologist needs to use Scientology Butthurt Cream? Below are three scenarios: Scenario […]
The Church of Scientology: Reality Television at its Fake Worst!

“You want reality television?”asked disaffected OTV Don Newland, a bitter and nearly-bankrupt man who doesn’t give a shit if he’s declared an SP. “Well the Church of Scientology is reality television at […]
2048 A.D. — Scientology Grand Opening of the Golden Deluxe Ark of the Covenant Org in Los Angeles!

Over 50 Scientologists attended the annual grand opening of the Los Angeles Org. This year’s theme was the Org as the “Golden Deluxe Ideal Ark of the Covenant Org.” COB RTC David […]
Church of Scientology to Purchase ISIS Oil

In order to ensure a supply of cheap gasoline to Scientology’s Ideal Org gas stations and mini-marts, Imam David Miscavige recently traveled to Syria and negotiated an oil deal with ISIS for […]
Actual OT Positive Case Gain is Here!

We in RTC wish to inform all OT’s that the $500,000 or more you may have donated in the past was all for negative case gain. Due to COB’s brilliance, we in […]
COB RTC David Miscavige Reaches Astonishing News Heights in Hair!

We in RTC hinted about it several weeks ago at Tony Ortega’s criminally suppressive blog. Someone at that blog posted a photo of Michael Douglas as Liberace. We knew that this would […]
Mr. David Miscavige Opens Portland Ideal Org — 25,000,000 Attend!

Self-medicated on coffee and heroin, the hundreds of millions of desperate wogs in the Great Northwest have lived in agony for endless eons while they awaited the promise that COB RTC David […]