“A recent OSA investigation has determined that Lee Baca, the former Sheriff of Los Angeles County, was the hidden SP on COB’s lines,” Church spokesman Ken Delusion solemnly announced to local newspaper reporters.
“Former Sheriff Baca was found to have secretly been connected to Psychiatry. Baca was only pretending to be COB’s friend, this in order to burnish his own image by appearing in photos with COB. Covertly, however, Baca was secretly there to sabotage everything: The Basics, GAT II, Super Power, and of course the Ideal Orgs,” Delusion stated.
“Former Sheriff Baca is the ‘who’ behind the chronic series of statcrashes during the past several years. Baca is also to blame for the the wave of attacks upon COB and the Church on the internet, this as proven by the confidential OSA investigation.”
“But most importantly, look at the major outpoint,” Delusion emphasized, “during his many decades in office, Sheriff Baca never once arrested even one of his fellow SP’s. That datum alone proves his guilt as the hidden SP on COB’s lines.”
“Now that Baca’s cover has been blown and he has finally been exposed as a Psych, we are 1000% confident that the the Church of Scientology can now enter a new and unparalleled Golden Age of heretofore unimagined straight up and vertical expansion,” Delusion resolutely assured Scientology parishioners.