COB RTC Mr. David Miscavige’s 14 Point Plan for America

While America plunges off the fiscal cliff and impales itself on the sharp jagged rocks of brutal tax increases, we in the Church of Scientology remain happily tax exempt and continue to flourish and prosper in a frenzy of straight up and vertical expansion of unprecedented magnitude.

In order to help America and Americans, COB RTC Mr. David Miscavige has created his 14 Point Plan for America.

RTC Chairman of the Board Mr. David Miscavige is in Washington D.C. counseling President Obama and Congressional Leaders on how to avoid the fiscal cliff by use of Scientology Finance Policy.

COB’s 14 point plan plan is easy to understand and will solve all of America’s problems:

1. Effective immediately, all government workers will be paid $10.00 per week. All so-called health care plans that only enrich Big Pharma will be cancelled. All so-called “pensions” will be cancelled as they are out exchange. “Growing old” or “being elderly” are just wog dramatizations; people can and should work until they drop their bodies on post.

2. Effective immediately, all private sector workers will be paid $10.00 per week .All so-called health care plans that only enrich Big Pharma will be cancelled as will retirement plans and the other financially draining nonsensical benefits that workers think they need. For example, teeth are designed to naturally fall out when they are decayed. Dental insurance plans are expensive and interfere with the natural order of things and so these plans will be cancelled.

3. Effective immediately, America’s so-called “health care system” is cancelled as it only enriches Big Pharma and lying medicos. The deadly and dangerous nonsense of vaccinating children against imaginary diseases such as typhus will end. Anyone who keys in an engram and has bodily somatics will be given a Scientology touch assist at their nearest Ideal Org for a flat fee of $100.Cal Mag will be added to the nation’s drinking water supply to ensure that all Americans destimulate from the various electronic incidents in which they are stuck.The Psych drug “fluoride” will be removed from the nation’s water supply. Touch assists, Cal Mag, and the removal of fluoride from drinking water will raise both America’s overall health and the national Tone Level.

4. Effective immediately, all out exchange welfare programs such as food stamps, medicare, and Social Security, and unemployment benefits will cease. Those who are dramatizing being needy, weak, sick, old, or unemployed will have to give up these serfacs and either work or starve.

5. All foreign aid will end immediately. Foreign aid is out exchange money given to criminal nations and this is to stop.

6. America will stop paying any money towards its so-called national debt. America will simply tell its creditors that they must wait a few years until the economy improves. Nations who call the US Treasury over and over demanding some kind of payments are to be put on hold and told to wait until the Treasury Secretary finishes his meeting. The Treasury Secretary is to be scheduled so that he is in meetings all the time and cannot come to the phone.

7. All R6 implant religions will lose their tax exemptions and be declared illegal. All of their assets will be seized by the US Treasury Police. The only true and legal religion in America is the Church of Scientology and the Constitution will be changed to reflect this fact. By definition, then, all Americans are now Scientologists.

8. All US Treasury Police and IRS Agents will be Scientology regges trained in clawing every last nickel out of people and prying gold teeth and silver fillings from the mouths of their victims as said victims kick and scream.  US Treasury Police and IRS Agents will have COB’s same ethics presence of cold chrome steel.


COB RTC Mr. David Miscavige demonstrates Scientology sec checking procedures to the US Senate Committee on Brutal Tax Collection Policy. The IRS and the Treasury Police will begin sec checking all Americans in 2013 to see if they have crimes against the US or are otherwise evading taxes.

9. All corporations will pay a flat 10% income tax to the US Government and a flat 40% of their gross profits to the Church of Scientology for our social betterment programs.

10. All individuals earning more than $10,000 per year will pay a flat 10% income tax to the US Government and a flat 20% of their gross income to the Church of Scientology for our social betterment programs.

11. IRS income tax audits will be mandatory for all US citizens as will IRS sec checks conducted by US Treasury Police. Those found to have crimes against the IRS will have all of their wealth confiscated and split equally between the US Government and the Church of Scientology. Tax evaders will then be conscripted into the Sea Org for one billion years. Pay is $10.00 per week.

12. All illegal aliens will be rounded up, issued green cards, and then conscripted into the Sea Org for one billion years.Pay is $10.00 per week.

13. All criminals in American prisons and jails will be rounded up, shipped to Montana, and then driven on foot into the vast wastelands of Canada.

14. All US schools will be converted into Delphi Academy schools and teachers will be paid $10 per week. Those students who fail to maintain a 3.0 GPA or higher will be conscripted into the Sea Org for one billion years. Pay is $10.00 per week.

COB’s 14 point plan will get America back on its feet in no time!

6 replies »

  1. Seeing how the Democrats and Republicans have both screwed the pooch on our credit rating and now the fiscal cliff, would COB David Miscavige consider establishing Scientology as a political third party?
    On a personal note, your absence created some talk around the clam watcher campfire that you may have been sent to the RPF. False rumors, bad datum and black PR, Merry R6 Implantmas.


  2. OT8, didn’t LRH invent government in ancient Greece in one of his previous lives? Didn’t he enact budget reform as a Roman tax commissioner in another previous life? And wasn’t Tom Cruise going to run for President, so he could channel LRH’s previous lives?


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