“We in the Church of Scientology are furious with QAnon!” roared Ken Delusion. “Selling paranoia and fear and implaning people is Scientology’s core business market,” Delusion emphasized. “QAnon has no goddamned business trying to cut into our lucrative Fear and Porn market.
Church of Scientology Responds to Rep. Karen Bass’ “Scientology Problem”
“We in the Church of Scientology are outraged about the way Senator Kamala Harris and her staff are having themselves a good laugh over Rep. Karen Bass’ ‘Scientology problem,’” said Church spokesman […]
Ethics Must Go In Before the Tech Can Go In!
We in RTC are constantly firing off missions to handle fundamental confusions which lead to Out Tech. Our stable datum is this: The Founder informs us that thetans compulsively mock up their […]
Secret Psych Implanter Elon Musk Lures Tom Cruise into a Space Trap!
Q: How does a Psych capture a mighty thetan like Tom Cruise? A: Space Secret Psych Implanter Elon Musk has lured Tom Cruise into a trap by offering him a ride into […]
Warning: There Are No E-Meters in the Between-Lives Area! Buy Your E-Meter Today!
“There are no e-meters in the between-lives area,” Flag Senior C/S Stayta Kleer warned Scientologists. “You’ve got to make it to full OT this time around.” “What a dangerous thought to consider: […]
Is Former Trump campaign aide Sam Nunberg Setting Up an “OT Insanity” Defense?
“We in Scientology have long warned the public that reading the OT materials without proper preparations will cause a person to freewheel through their implants, catch pneumonia, and die,” said Church spokesman […]
47 New Scientology Implanting Stations Now Open
47 new Scientology Implanting Stations now open. Come in for a free implant and experience our seriously disturbing behavioral modification.
Top Secret Documents Leaked! NWO Psych Conspiracy Revealed!
SHADOWMAN IMPLANTING GROUP LLC (SIG LLC) CONFIDENTIAL OPERATIONS AND TECHNICAL MANUAL WIRELESS AIRBORNE BT TECHNOLOGY (WABITT AI) INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY SIG LLC WIRELESS AIRBORNE BT TECHNOLOGY (WABITT AI) OVERVIEW. Purpose: The WABITT is […]