The Church of Scientology Awards Sheriff Lee Baca a Major Award

Today, we in the Church of Scientology bestowed our highest award upon Los Angeles County Sheriff Lee Baca, this for his having handed out copies of The Way to Happiness in Inglewood, California, a downstat town known only for having a giant donut:

Located near the Pacific Ocean according to our giant wall map of global domination, Inglewood has an airplane symbol on it, which means there is an airport there named Inglewood Airport.

As a result copies of The Way to Happiness being passed out in Inglewood, crime immediately dropped 97% and this is why the Church of Scientology today gave Sheriff Baca an important award at a special ceremony.

Sheriff Baca receives Scientology’s highest award given to wogs we deem important to our success

Following the Church ceremony, Sheriff Baca and his deputies went over to the donut shop for donuts and coffee.

Sheriff Baca accidentally left his Scientology award at the donut shop when he headed back to the station house.

We in RTC are offering a $50 reward for its safe return.

7 responses to “The Church of Scientology Awards Sheriff Lee Baca a Major Award

  1. Do you misplace things?

    Do you make up bogus awards to distract attention from embarassing news?

    Do you exaggerate?

    Do you have a fetish for bow ties?


  2. Does Randy’s serve Kool-Aid?


  3. I just backflashed you and Baca.


  4. Have you ever seen your favorite NFL team win a Super Bowl?


  5. thenextmrstomcruise

    OTViii, in honor of Thanksgiving, I am sending you a turkey stuffed with rice and beans. Enjoy!


  6. Happy Thanksgiving OTVIIIisGrrr8! Although gratitude is low-tone, isn’t it? Oh well… 🙂


  7. Are you delusional?

    Do you hide money overseas?

    Do you have a sham marriage?

    Have you ever heard of blue asbestos?

    Do you spy on people?


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