OTVIIIisGrrr8!

The World's Best Satire of the Church of Scientology and its Leader David Miscavige

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The UN Hires Scientology Leader David Miscavige to Fix the Global Economic Crisis

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on April 14, 2020 • ( 6 Comments )

“The UN has hired Mr. David Miscavige to solve the world’s economic disaster,” said Scientology spokesperson Ken Delusion. “Mr. Miscavige has outlined his seven point plan using LRH business technology to implement […]

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Say Yes to Scientology! Say No to Deadly Vaccines!

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on April 11, 2020 • ( 3 Comments )

It is a proven fact that only Scientology can help you. Vaccines are full of deadly dead viruses and are designed by the Communist-Chinese-controlled World Health Organization to kill everyone in the […]

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David Miscavige Seeks $5 Billion in Federal Bailout Money for the Church of Scientology

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on April 7, 2020 • ( 6 Comments )

Sporting a new Donald Trump coiffure and 30 extra pounds from “shelter in place” binge eating while watching Netflix, Scientology leader David Miscavige announced today that he is asking the US Federal […]

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Chinese Government Arrests Scientology Leader David Miscavige

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on April 6, 2020 • ( 2 Comments )

While he was on a secret trip to Macau to handle a very urgent and highly-secretive Scientology financial matter, the Chinese government today arrested ecclesiastical leader David Miscavige. The Chinese authorities charged […]

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Xenu’s Cheerleaders

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 29, 2020 • ( 7 Comments )

Xenu’s cheerleaders will do anything to keep the masses away from Scientology Orgs — particularly now that Mr. David Miscavige has completed his Herculean task of building and opening 15,708 Ideal Orgs […]

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Fleet Admiral David Miscavige Places All Florida Scientologists Into “Doubt” After Mark Bunker Wins Clearwater City Council Seat

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 18, 2020 • ( 5 Comments )

Visibly shaken and enraged by Mark Bunker’s win in Clearwater, Fleet Admiral David Miscavige went live today on Scientology TV to berate all Floridian Scientologists for being theetie-wheetie dilettantes who allowed this […]

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The Reason Why Scientology Is Not Closing Its Ideal Orgs

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 17, 2020 • ( 4 Comments )

“Scientology has no plans to close its Orgs,” said spokesman Ken Delusion. “There is no need to close them because the Orgs have already been empty for almost twenty years now.” “Now […]

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Dr. Kirstie Alley on the Coronavirus, Tom Cruise & John Travolta

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 14, 2020 • ( 2 Comments )

As Tom Cruise taught us, Scientologists are the only ones who can help. Scientologists are also the only people who can shatter suppression and handle SP’s. Even as Dr. Kirstie Alley is […]

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Protecting the Two Biggest Beings in the Universe From Coronavirus: David Miscavige and Tom Cruise Jet Off to Scientology’s Trementina Base

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 13, 2020 • ( 6 Comments )

David Miscavige and Tom Cruise are the two biggest beings in the universe. As such, they must be protected at all costs from the Coronavirus. For this reason, the two world leaders […]

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Contrary to Fifth Invader Force Black PR, Scientology Does Not Suck!

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 12, 2020 • ( 4 Comments )

Two members of the Fifth Invader Force landed on Earth some months ago in human meat bodies. The demented duo infiltrated Scientology organizations in an attempt at Joking & Degrading and Black […]

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