OTVIIIisGrrr8!

Outrageous Satires Of the Church of Scientology, Crazed Cults, and Assorted Lunacies

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COB RTC David Miscavige Is Missing! Part 1

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 30, 2013 • ( Leave a comment )

XIV COB RTC David Miscavige had seemingly disappeared into thin air. Senior RTC officials quickly arrived from Int Base to take over the search for COB. These officials ordered an “all hands” […]

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David Miscavige Personally Inspects Dirty Restrooms — Part 3

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 29, 2013 • ( 4 Comments )

XIII The fight that began in the small dirty man’s restroom spilled out into the hallways and course rooms of the Los Angeles Ideal Org. By the time HCO had brought order, […]

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David Miscavige Personally Inspects Dirty Restrooms — Part 2

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 28, 2013 • ( 7 Comments )

IV COB RTC David Miscavige has five main Sea Org bodyguards, all hulking brutes. Their names are Vance, Tony, John, Andrew, and Captain Howdy. The thing about COB’s bodyguards is that their […]

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David Miscavige Personally Inspects Dirty Restrooms — Part 1

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 23, 2013 • ( 19 Comments )

I COB RTC David Miscavige was in a state of rage and anger as he read the Knowledge Report on the filthy conditions at the Complex. This group of buildings in Hollywood […]

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Data on Ideal Org Building Outpoints

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 23, 2013 • ( 8 Comments )

COB RTC David Miscavige has just received a shocking a KR concerning outpoints in Los Angeles Area Ideal Orgs! It seems that these Ideal Orgs are filthy and are not being properly […]

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Special Report from Scientology DC: The Psychs are Now on Death Ground!

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 22, 2013 • ( 7 Comments )

Confidential internal briefing to Scientologists from the Church of Scientology’s Office of Government Affairs in Washington DC. This is a secret briefing from Lead VM Tom Wells. Please note this line: “number […]

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Scientology Ideal Orgs!

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 20, 2013 • ( 4 Comments )

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Church of Scientology to Acquire Smaller Religions in Cult Consolidation

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 18, 2013 • ( 16 Comments )

“If you want to really grow a business the fastest way is to buy other businesses,” declared Church of Scientology spokesman Ken Delusion during a press conference today at the Scientology One […]

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Church of Scientology Set to Nab the Kardashian’s and Kanye West!

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 15, 2013 • ( 10 Comments )

For internal distribution to Scientologists only! We in RTC recently got a KR concerning the tabloids blathering on about how Kyle Jenner is studying Scientology with Jaden Smith, the son of Will […]

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Angry Gay Cardinals in the Vatican

By OTVIIIisGrrr8! on March 14, 2013 • ( 15 Comments )

The matter had been settled weeks ago: COB RTC David Miscavige was to become the new Pope of the Catholic Church. Papal vestments were made and plans were drawn up for a […]

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