Kim Jong-un Attains State of Clear in Scientology!


North Korean leader Kim Jong-un has just reached the State of Clear at Scientology’s Pyongyang Ideal Org.

“I’m so happy to have finally reached the State Clear! I’ve eradicated my reactive mind forever!” enthused Kim Jong-un. “No more engrams, irrational computations, or sicknesses! I now have a perfect memory, a 190 IQ, and can read a 1,000 page book in ten minutes with full comprehension.”

“As the world’s first Cleared Communist, I can now rationally and sanely realize my goal of destroying America and all of the other running dog Imperialists in the West! Thank you COB RTC David Miscavige! You are a superman just like me!”

14 replies »

  1. Having attained the exalted State of Clear puts Mr. Kim smack dab in the Non-Interference Zone. Let the real fun and case gain begin!!!!! After a trip to the Reg’s office of course.

    P.S. May I ask what Status Mr. Kim has reached in the IAS? Surely Uranium Meritorius!!!!


  2. Is it just the camera-angle and the framed certificate, or has Fat Boy dropped a few pounds lately? With his dicy ankles, it can’t be the Running Program, so it must be the combined laxative effects of mega-doses of niacin, and the Sea Org rice’n’beans diet.


  3. A bridge step no doubt funded by the sale of meth, exotic animal parts, and counterfeit currency… Gettin’ those ethics IN Fat Boi!


  4. Conratulations Mr. Kim Jong-Un on attaining the State of Clear with the
    Church of Scientology.
    I have also attained the State of Clear with the Church of Scientology, Flag,
    in Clearwater, Florida, USA.
    I now live in Mumbai, India working with the Don Bosco Provincial House in
    Please respond.
    Thank you.


  5. Kim Jong-un you are simply GREAT!!!!. Thank you in a big way for
    responding to my quest to stop the third world war.
    I am so impressed with North Korea. I feel ubelievable.
    You have the USA and Russia in your pocket according to me.

    Best wishes. I will be in touch. CLEARs don’t lose to anything in the world.
    Have a nice day.

    Clement Booms and Paulee.


  6. Please check. Mr Donald Trump might leave you out of the United Nations.

    He has left out himself Tea.

    Mr Donald Trump is a Clear also like me. Kamsa hamni.


  7. Thank you for the big win. Please ask Mr. Putin to come to the Summit
    on June 12 in Singapore.

    My prayer: Knock and it shall open
    seek and you shall find
    Ask and it shall be given you


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