Scientology National Affairs Office — Press Release

Scientology National Affairs Office
1701 20th St NW
Washington, DC 20009

PRESS RELEASE

Scientologist Trish Duggan today met with senior Trump administration officials to lobby for the establishment of an Office of Scientology in the White House (OSWH). The OSWH would act as an executive police body to sec check and find the crimes of Senators and Congresspeople and other CICS government officials who show SP tendencies towards the President. The OSWH would also burglarize government offices as needed given Scientology’s historical experience in high level burglaries. Mr. Don Alverzo would be the Burglaries IC.

President Trump expressed interest but said that Scientology’s proposed prices for these services were an outrageous ripoff. Fleet Admiral David Miscavige quickly offered steep discounts for sec checking if the President promised to protect Scientology’s tax exemption and give Scientology protection from the FBI, IRS, and law enforcement agencies domestic and foreign.

Fleet Admiral Miscavige demonstrated the e-meter at a press conference today. This was followed by Mr. Ken Delusion conducting a tour of Scientology’s vitally needed new Clay Demo facility in Washington DC.

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4 responses to “Scientology National Affairs Office — Press Release

  1. and after Drumpf was offered the chance to wear a Uniform with shiny gold buttons; he embraced the SeaOrg as his personal Navy!

    Like

  2. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Venus_de_Milo
    Scientologist’s sculpture of Venus de Milo with restored arms sells for a gazillion dollars. “All those years of clay demos helped me perfect my art! KSW! ”
    Church reg was waiting to snatch the check out of the artist hand stating, “This will be enough to get you up the Bridge to Total Freedom to OT6. Maybe. Thank you for your donation.”

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This effort is no doubt building on the black site interrogations of enemy combatants captured overseas. It can now be revealed OSA has been sec-checking enemy combatants in a secret CIA sponsored campaign put into effect when the Obama administration introduced sec-checking after putting the kibosh on water-boarding. Ideal Orgs function magnificently as black sites since they literally hide right out in the open. The Joburg sec-check has proven more effective than water-boarding and is exempt from Geneva Convention rules related to torture, so the program has been a win-win.

    It is therefore no large surprise to find this technology applied now to domestic enemies, as well as foreign.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I Love this Jeff.May it Not Come To Pass.💛

    Like

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