Looking Back: Scientology 2016

And now as we prepare to turn another page on eternity, let us look back on what we in the Church of Scientology did in 2016.

We almost finished the fundraise on the SFV Ideal Org:

val12

Thanks to COB, we opened Scientology Media Productions. The hundreds of thousands of Scientologists in good standing in Southern California attended. And, we in RTC are pleased to report that SMP almost made a film:

35fcda0300000578-3629275-image-a-2_1467804046812

We purged dirty cop Lee Whatshisname from all Scientology websites:

baca

Thanks to the Golden Era SFX Department, none of the molded body parts or engineered hair appliances on John Travolta fell off or broke:

john-travolta-beard-hollywood-style-latest-mens-hairstyle-2016-hair-cut-beard-trends

And now we arrive at Scientology’s greatest 2016 accomplishment: There were no major escapes or blows. Thanks to COB’s patented blow drills, Tom Cruise’s attempted escape from Trementina Base was derailed. Likewise, Shelly was unable to escape from Twin Peaks.

tc-escape

4 responses to “Looking Back: Scientology 2016

  1. “dirty cop Lee Whatshisname” You mean Lee Baca?

    “engineered hair appliances on John Travolta fell off or broke” wait, I thought that Kelly Preston was his beard.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. COB’s greatest accomplishment in 2016: he managed to stay out of prison, which is exactly where he belongs.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. “SMP almost made a film” Well that is an achievement. LOL.

    Like

  4. I know Mike Rinder is busy but will you be doing a year in review video with him for 2016? He was spot on last year with his predictions!

    Like

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