The Real Story Behind Empty Scientology Orgs

Empty.Bldgs.

Scientology bitter defrocked apostates are quick to talk about Scientology Orgs being empty — and they are indeed empty.

Abandoned Hotels

Even the downstat, non-Ideal, and prison-like Orgs such as Brighton are empty:

Brighton4

What is the real story behind empty Ideal Orgs?

The real story here is not the lies told by Suppressive Persons:

Scientologists are staying away from Orgs in record numbers because they believe COB RTC Mr. David Miscavige is an SP and a squirrel who is bent upon destroying Scientology.

Scientologists are staying away from Orgs in record numbers to avoid continued and nonstop financial predation by Scientology regges.

Scientologists are staying away for fear of brutal ethics handlings.

Scientologists are staying away because they are disaffected and have watched Going Clear; have read The Unbreakable Miss Lovely by Tony Ortega; or worse, have read Troublemaker by Leah Remini.

None of these reasons are true. The real reason the Ideal Orgs are empty is because COB’s miracle of GAT II has wildly succeeded beyond all expectations.

Fully 99.999% of the Church’s 1,200,000,000 parishioners are now on SOLO Not’s and are soloing at home. This means the theta-to-entheta ratio will soon be reversed. COB has predicted that planetary clearing will be achieved very soon; specifically on April 4, 2016 at 1200 hours GMT.

There is now really no need for Scientologists to ever go into their Orgs. For this reason, COB is selling all of the Orgs on an urgent basis and at fire sale prices. The monies realized by the sales of the Orgs will be used to construct and maintain the vitally necessary COB Grand Palace Complex on a small private chain of islands near the Bahamas.

This chain of islands was recently purchased by the IAS for $1.2 billion and gifted to COB in appreciation of his decades of tireless and herculean service to Scientology. Thus, when COB becomes absent on an indefinite basis in the very near future it is only because he has left for his new Palace to perfect GAT III: The Ninth Wall of Fire. This level is beyond the beyond and will finally crack the case of the entire planet and all galaxies within 100,000 light years of Earth.

5 responses to “The Real Story Behind Empty Scientology Orgs

  1. I feel my case cracking already!

    Liked by 3 people

  2. “Thus, when COB becomes absent on an indefinite basis in the very near future it is only because he has left for his new Palace…”

    OMG!!! This explains everything!!! Even though it isn’t stated outright in this groundbreaking report, I KNOW the ‘hidden data line’ for sure. This is where Shelly has been all these years!!! She has been lovingly preparing a retirement villa for her devoted husband, COB RTC, Fleet Admiral Captain David ‘Blackheart’ Miscavige. I am sure that they will be reunited soon and will share the unimaginable pride, that only they can, in knowing that they alone pulled off planetary clearing almost single-handedly.

    Now I can finally handle and shatter those pesky wog co-workers who are always giving me shit and asking, “Where’s Shelly?” If they only knew…

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Remember the good old days…when Scientology used to try pass itself off as just another religion. Looks like that ship has sailed. Port of Call – Homo-Novi Island. The only ones left are either whales, Ron-bots on the verge of bankruptcy, or flying under the radar waiting to be declared closet apostates.

    Anyone still buying this mess deserves ADA protection. I’ll bet COB is already looking into it.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Sorry, but I couldn’t read all that.
    The real reason for the apparent vacancy at the ideal orgs is, as that great yogi said “No one goes there anymore. Its too crowded.”
    You’re welcome.
    Again.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. LMAO – and the Island is going to sink into the sea due to global warming

    Like

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