Captain Miscavige Turns 55, Has Chinese in Hemet


David Miscavige turned 55 today and had dinner at the China Palace in Hemet with WDC Chairman and his new vice-communicator Holotta Delusion, wife of Church spokesman Ken Delusion.

When presented with the bill, Mr. Miscavige demanded, and was given, the 10% seniors discount.

Fresh off his triumph of opening the nondescript and essentially unnecessary Basel Ideal Org, Mr. Miscavige’s future plans include spending time with his wog lawyers studying defenses to RICO.

10 replies »

  1. Holotta Delusion? I knew her when she was still Hollatta Malarkey. It’s fitting that the two iconic Scientologly families of Malarkey and Delusion would unite.


  2. I understand that now that COB is official AARP material, he now likes his little blue night-time niacin pills more than ever. You know, the ones that may cause four hour cognitions. I’ve also heard through the grapevine that COB and Lou are calling each other Smoochie and Love Mutton, Can anyone confirm those pet names?


    • How dare you speak that way. COB Miscavige is and will always be faithful to his wife ummmm Shirley??? Stacey? Samantha? Oh right Shelly.


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