“Flag OT Ambassadors and OT Committee commissioned a sculptor to create a piece epitomizing the cosmic greatness of COB RTC David Miscavige,” gushed Church of Scientology spokesman Ken Delusion.
“Galactic Samurai was the result, and we at Flag feel that this image perfectly captures the ‘Galactic Salvation’ that radiates from COB’s human form. Indeed, to gaze upon COB’s Divine Person is to instantly be so blown out of case that one need not even do the Bridge. All that remains, therefore, is to honor the Galactic Samurai by increasing one’s IAS Patron Status.”
“And now, behold the glory of Mr. David Miscavige, Galactic Samurai:
“The Galactic Samurainess of Mr. Miscavige is truly captured in this very smallish sculpture that will be enshrined in the Great Hall of Exact Data.”
“On the base of the Galactic Samurai is mounted plaque bearing testimony to the enormous contributions of Mr. Miscavige that reach into eternity and have thereby manifested thousands of Ideal Orgs by his pure theta postulate. Of course, the few billion dollars IAS members have coughed up helped, but even then the Ideal Orgs would not have happened without the Cosmic Samurai intending it to be so: Buildings don’t buy themselves. COB had to actually make it go right because only he has the exact Tech of buying MEST.”
“Galactic Samurai is a striking compliment to Ken Doll COB, the neutered statue of Mr. Miscavige in the shrubbery garden at St. Hill,” noted Delusion in his closing remarks. Whereupon, free pie, cake, and pizza were served to the 128 Clearwater parishioners who had attended the unveiling of Galactic Samurai