COB RTC David Miscavige – Galactic Samurai

“Flag OT Ambassadors and OT Committee commissioned a sculptor to create a piece epitomizing the cosmic greatness of COB RTC David Miscavige,” gushed Church of Scientology spokesman Ken Delusion.

Galactic Samurai was the result, and we at Flag feel that this image perfectly captures the ‘Galactic Salvation’ that radiates from COB’s human form. Indeed, to gaze upon COB’s Divine Person is to instantly be so blown out of case that one need not even do the Bridge. All that remains, therefore, is to honor the Galactic Samurai by increasing one’s IAS Patron Status.”

“And now, behold the glory of Mr. David Miscavige, Galactic Samurai:

“The Galactic Samurainess of Mr. Miscavige is truly captured in this very smallish sculpture that will be enshrined in the Great Hall of Exact Data.”

“On the base of the  Galactic Samurai is mounted plaque bearing testimony to the enormous contributions of Mr. Miscavige that reach into eternity and have thereby manifested thousands of Ideal Orgs by his pure theta postulate. Of course, the few billion dollars IAS members have coughed up helped, but even then the Ideal Orgs would not have happened without the Cosmic Samurai intending it to be so: Buildings don’t buy themselves. COB had to actually make it go right because only he has the exact Tech of buying MEST.”


“Galactic Samurai is a striking compliment to Ken Doll COB, the neutered statue of Mr. Miscavige in the shrubbery garden at St. Hill,” noted Delusion in his closing remarks. Whereupon, free pie, cake, and pizza were served to the 128 Clearwater parishioners who had attended the unveiling of Galactic Samurai


6 replies »

  1. Absolutely theta! As I am reading this, I perceive, how planetary case is just disappearing.


  2. “The Galactic Samurainess of Mr. Miscavige is truly captured in this very smallish sculpture that will be enshrined in the Great Hall of Exact Data.”

    Is there a ‘Lesser Hall of Half-assed Data”, and if so, what would one store there?

    I am sorry, but COB’s statue looks like something given for ‘Best Costume at a Power Rangers Convention’. The IAS bowling trophies are much nicer.


  3. The “Galactic Samurai” has a major cultural faux pas: the front lapels of the samurai’s jacket are overlapping in the WRONG way….

    In Japan, when someone dies, they dress the corpse in a kimono and wrap the lapels with the right-side lapel overlapping (on top of) the left-side lapel….

    Thus the Galactic Samurai is dressed as a CORPSE would be! (For a western context: imagine a statue of Davey as a wild west gunslinger—with arms crossed over his chest and holding a Lily ….just like a dead gunslinger would appear in a coffin…same imagery)

    Anyone with cultural knowledge of Japan would notice that wrong kimono lapel placement right away.

    Maybe the “Corpse-style” dressing of the Galactic Samurai is a Subtle Metaphor for Davey MisCarriage’s tenure over CO$ ????

    Oh yes — and any TRUE samurai or swordsman would NEVER wield a sword directly in front of his OWN face —be it a sword or a whimsical thunderbolt….


  4. It is a totally preposteous and degrading action to associate COB with the Galactic Samurai sculpture.

    For the same reasons that you do NOT call COB “Captain Miscavige”.

    Moreover and more to the point: Isn’t this woman, Nina Winters, aware that she placed a full siezed version of the sculpture in the state of Texas ?

    A state COB will absolutely NOT be associated with !


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.