Scientology: We Deny Financial Crimes!

We in RTC  emphatically deny that the Church of Scientology is the alter ego of Captain David Miscavige — and Tommy Davis had best keep his mouth shut about such matters when Ray Jeffrey deposes him!

We in RTC further deny the allegations of lack of financial transparency in this video made Karen de la Carriere — Karen#1.

As the world’s most ethical group, we are not to subject to the same standards as all of those deceptive wog charities and religions that routinely lie and cheat. These wog groups should be scrutinized, but not us. The fact of the matter is that the Church of Scientology has set the gold standard for financial honesty and integrity for decades.

9 responses to “Scientology: We Deny Financial Crimes!

  1. So GAT is actually the “Golden Age of Transparency”?

    Transparently fraudulent?

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  2. r2-45 for all wogs

    exactly, otviiiisgrrr8. i know that when i donate my hard-earned money ($50 p/w s.o. pay and whatever i can manage without passing out or on to the next lifetime via blood and semen banks) to the cos and ias, i know that said money goes directly to dissemination and furtherance of scientology causes worldwide. i know for a fact that this money is not used on cob by way of lamb flown in from new zealand, macallan scotch flown in from scotland or personal assistants as cob’s integrity and honesty shine far above all others. why the rest of the world fails to see this really enturbulates me. oh hey, the dizziness just wore off. back to the blood and semen banks to further cos causes all around the world! we are dauntless, defiant, resolute…

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  3. It’s really not a financial crime, but when I purchase Davey’s dildos, my credit card statement says “Clam Dildo.” For future purchases from this satisfied customer, would it be too much to ask that the line be changed to say “Big Being Sporting Goods?” The reason being, whenever I drop off by bills to my accountant, his assistant gives me funny looks.

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  4. I hear that COB is that funny colour (a sort of greenish-beige) not through over-use of sunbeds or spray-tans, but because of his obsessive money-bathing, in a mixture of $500 bills and specially imported Scottish £100 notes. Some of the ink rubs off the cash, and has permanently dyed him that strange tint, poor devil.

    Of course, the money has to be literally as well as metaphorically laundered after he’s finished with it – but at least this present fetish is less dangerous than his previous kink – wallowing in a vat of Krugerrands and sovereigns. His personal proctologist was on almost permanent call to remove coins that had become (how to put this tactfully?) lodged in the rear exit.

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    • r2-45 for all wogs

      you have heard wrong, mark. such entheta is considered slander per se. i am writing my k.r. to cob and rtc immediately after this reply. expect to be served with a civil complaint and summons asap. i also hear the squirrel busters are free and available. be afraid. be very afraid, mark.

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  5. Dear Sir, little David came home from school today and was very upset, he says he is being bullied by some bigger boys. His distress is now so bad that he’s bed wetting, and sucking his thumb. He is now 12 years of age and I think it’s time he grew out of this behaviour, pehaps some therapeutic butthurt administered by yourself might be the answer.
    You have my permission to go at it any which way.

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  6. Pingback: Scientology: We Deny Financial Crimes! | Ex-Scientologists Ireland

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