OTVIIIisGrrr8!

Why L. Ron Hubbard Was Not Able to Predict the Internet

 

Wog haters often taunt we in Scientology because our Founder “Ron” (his Earth name) was unable to foresee or predict the internet and the damage it would do to Scientology. Now it can be revealed why the Founder didn’t see it: The Psychs went into the future and used a Romulan cloaking device to hide the internet. When Ron scanned the future he didn’t see the internet because it was hidden.

The Romulan cloaking device still hasn’t been invented and won’t be for 212 more years. And yet the Psychs were able to time travel to get the cloaking device. We in Scientology are sending Abdul Malik Sayyid Muhammad into the future to prevent the Psychs from getting the Romulan cloaking device. Once this happens, the past will change and Ron will see the internet. This will allow Fleet Admiral Miscavige to destroy the internet in 1992 by using his OT powers.

Once the cloaking device is destroyed in the future the measles epidemic on the Freewinds, Anonymous, Battlefield Earth the film and all of the other bad, bad, bad things that have happened to Scientology also will not happen.

4 replies »

  1. OMG, this is some of the best news that I have heard in a long time. I was just about to put my Scientology ClearSound (©®™$θ) tapes on eBay for $.019 each. With this news, they will be worth their full value again. In addition, I will be able to buy a brand new Telex machine to get all of the latest news from the world’s coolest (and most advanced) religion on the Whole Track!!!!!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. This is an interesting claim, but I heard that the cause was that Hubbard was on psych drugs – vistaril, a psychiatric medicine. There is also a rumor that COB is on a different psychiatric drug: butt polish.

    Liked by 2 people

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