International tycoon, financier, and man-of-mystery Lionel Drinkwater sat in his palatial office overlooking the verdant lagoon on the legendary Drinkwater Island, a small sovereign island nation founded by his Grandfather.
Known for its incredible beauty, resorts, and famous “no limit” casino, Drinkwater Island was a refuge in paradise for the ultra-wealthy.
Lionel Drinking was reading a most singular telex he had been received in the last hour:
“Dear Mr. Drinkwater,
My name is Captain David Miscavige of the Sea Organization. I am writing to request your assistance, i.e. a Drinkwater Island passport and sanctuary on Drinkwater Island.
Please advise soonest on what it would take for myself and my entourage of ten Sea Org members to gain permanent residency on Drinkwater Island.
I am eager to proceed as my present residence in a nuclear-proof vault, while secure, is dreary.
Your prompt reply is very much appreciated; it seems I need to leave the US on short notice.
Captain David Miscavige
The Sea Organization
New Mexico, USA”
The Captain’s letter was very fascinating to Lionel Drinkwater — but not for reasons Captain Miscavige would need to know about. Accordingly, Drinkwater replied by telex:
“Dear Captain Miscavige,
I am in receipt of your most earnest entreaty.
Please send me a copy of your international passport so that I know you really are who you say you are.