Shoop by Observer
“Scientology leader David Miscavige stole a pig from a local farm today and is believed headed south towards Mexico.” said Sheriff Ned Forotees of Hemet. “Mr. MIscavige was carrying a backpack stuffed with cash and was armed with a water-soaker type of toy gun. He appears to be mentally deranged,” the Sheriff added.
“A $500 reward is being offered for the safe return of the pig.”
Categories: OTVIIIisGrrr8!
OTVIIIisGrrr8! 
Miscavige won’t get away with it. My fearsome and resourceful amanuensis Nurse Tsai-Chin Proutley is already in hot pursuit with the overdue bills from my Electro-Psychotic Clinic and Vibro-Wobble Parlour.
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Mr. Miscavige needs his Vibro-Wobble treatments. It would be unethical to cease treatment due to something as minor as nonpayment.
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You don’t know that the pig COB stole was a flying pig!! He will use it to escape to a place where he can bribe the local government to prevent his extradition back to the US, where he would face criminal charges that are much more serious than pig theft!
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You make it sound sleazy when it is simply nothing more than administrative travel to avoid arrest.
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You’re right. Administrative travel does not limit the means of transportation. Although he may have a problem liquidating his expenses if the pig will not provide a fare receipt.
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The pig is not an Uber so you have a point there.
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