Stock Photo Scientologists Executive Director Alicia Selverson today welcomed our newest nonexistent member Jonas Hammond. “Jonas is already wearing his hat and stepped in to defend Real Scientologist Taryn Teutsch on her Facebook page,” said Selverson.
“We Stock Photo Scientologists are here to help Taryn Teutsch on her Fair Game rampage of lunacy and lies,” averred Selverson. “The beauty of stock photos is that we, like Taryn, have absolutely no morals and no need for wog weaknesses such as truthfulness. We really are quite horrible — and that’s what makes us such great Scientologists!”
The Church of Stock Photo Scientologists (CSPS) is a church within the ecclesiastical hierarchy of the churches of Scientology. CSPS has grown over 3000% in the past year alone as real Scientologists continue to blow in alarming numbers due to Marcab silent mind control radio putting blow thoughts into their heads.
Hmm… did Jonas forget to plaster a “Shutterstock” watermark across his face, or is he in actually in the public domain, and all too hairily real?
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Phony members. Phony church – actually an evil criminal cult pretending to be a church, so they can steal more money.
I actually love being a member of the Church of Stock Photo Scientologists!!! Especially since I can use stock photo credit cards and postulate checks to ascend the Stock Photo Bridge to Total Freedom. The wins and abilities gained with Stock Photo GAT II auditing and training are just as valid as old school Scientology. I know this because the Success Stories are the same. Also, when it comes to Ethics and Admin Tech, Stock Photo stat graphs are just as valid as the old school Ethics and Admin except you don’t feel like you have just had your ass reamed or have a stat crash hangover.