Can you be a Scientologist and a Pentecostal snake-handler? The answer is a definite “yes” according to Scientology leader Captain David Miscavige.
“We in Scientology welcome Pentecostal snake-handlers and members of all other faith traditions,” Miscavige said. “Why just the other day I was at an Ideal Org snake handling event where I handled many deadly serpents. I was not bitten because I flowed theta to the snakes!”
“Scientology gives people tools to improve their lives. So if you’re a Pentecostal snake-handler, Scientology will make you a better snake handler. For example, if you get bitten by a snake, Scientology touch assists will help you get better faster.”
“In order to show Scientology’s commitment to Pentecostal snake-handlers, we have already launched a fundraiser to build seven Ideal Snake Handling Orgs throughout Appalachia,” Miscavige enthused.