“The Church of Scientology today agreed to use its upper level technology to help Jesus defeat Satan once and for all,” announced spokesman Ken Delusion. “Our work to end the endless Manichaeism of failed Monotheism was done in exchange for all Christians signing up for Scientology courses. YHWH is expected to make a formal announcement this Saturday ordering all Christians to comply with his sovereign will. Accordingly, if you’re a Christian you will soon be receiving your ‘Welcome to Scientology’ kit at your home Church. We look forward to seeing you in our Ideal Orgs!”
List of Suppressive Persons:
Clouds Over Scientology
- Real Scientologists Demand Cash Auditing Subsidies from the US Government
- Scientology’s Los Angeles Interfaith Coalition Hosts an Event
- The Intellectual Bandwidth of Scientologist Marisol Nichols
- Scientologist Katherine Fraser Uses OT Force Field to Stop Wog Journo Tara Brown of 60 Minutes Australia
- Scientology Leader David Miscavige Purchases the Preserved Head of 19th Century Killer Diogo Alves
- The Great Global Flood Is Coming! Only the Scientology Ark Can Save You!
- Scientology Interfaith Event Speaker Contract and Release
- STAND League Member Ed Parkin Disguises Himself as Mr. Peanut
- Attn Scientologists: The “Religious Bigotry” Emergency Alarm Button is Now Available: Get It, Use It!
- Mr. Peanut: The Face of Hatred From the Psych Legume Lobby!
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