“People have asked we in Scientology why our paid apologist Massimo Introvigne sleeps in an open coffin located in the CESNUR library,” Church spokesman Ken Delusion noted in response to questions.

“Massimo explained to us that he must leave his body each night by use of astral projection. Massimo says he does this in order to ascend on high to immerse himself in the Aetheric Seven Rays of St. Germain wherein he rejuvenates his occultic energies.

“Massimo states the only way to properly engage in astral projection this is to sleep in an open coffin,” Delusion explained.

Massimo gave us this image of what his experience of leaving his body to astral project is like:

“It is clear to us in Scientology that Massimo Introvigne is hallucinating because exteriorizing from the body is impossible without the use of Scientology’s technology.

“Nevertheless, we in Scientology overlook the hallucinations of Massimo Introvigne as we find him to be a useful wog,” Delusion concluded.