Missing Person Alert!

.3Last seen heading out for a leisurely swim in a Florida swamp while on vacation, senior Church executive Jenny Linson has gone missing.

“Jenny is such a hard and dedicated worker,” explained Church spokesman Ken Delusion, “that COB had to literally order her to take her annual Sea Org six week paid vacation.”

“Jenny decided upon a hiking and camping vacation in Six Mile Slough, a swamp preserve near Fort Meyers, Florida,” Delusion noted.

“We are also very concerned,” Delusion added, “about what happened to Marc Yager and Dave Bloomberg. We have not heard from either of them since they headed down to a very remote part of the Andes for a skydiving vacation.”

Six Mile Slough 6-27-2010 075

17 responses to “Missing Person Alert!

  1. Whilst there have been no reported sighting of missing person Jenny Linson so far, Florida state police are baffled by the discovery of numerous dead alligators and pythons in Six Mile Slough. “It appears, that the creatures have been frightened to death. There were no visible signs of injury.” said a police spokesman, “Just indications of extreme trauma and shock.”

    Andrew

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  2. What makes me a little misemotional here is the disgusting picture you chose to bring of Nurse Ratched, as if she´s some kind of monster or something. She is, after all, the one who launched the new NGAFAY campaign, making Scientology known all over the world and driving thousands, if not millions, of new people into our churches across the entire planet. I think she deserves to be treated with some respect, even though she´s on her well deserved summer vacation at the moment.

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    • Birgit, we in RTC understand that you may be experiencing the effects of a secondary. But please understand that Jenny is not grieving. However, she is still missing as of 0800 today.

      Jenny Linson keys in so much misemotion in others that she is called “Miss Emotion” here at Int Base.

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  3. Is it coincidence that right after TC shows DM the classic movie “The Most Dangerous Game” Jenny and Co just “decide” to take a vacation in the remote wilderness? Tom, I am shocked and disappointed. You guys are sick! – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlLIquCiyUw

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  4. Shelly Miscavige’s attorney David Soter will soon be releasing a press statement stating that the claim that another woman closely connected to David Miscavige “is not missing. The claim is utterly ridiculous and unfounded.”

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    • Jenny is missing. However, so are Marc and Dave — and they dropped Jenny off in Florida on their way to the Andes. If this turns into some kind of big deal, the authorities would need to talk to Dave and Marc about Jenny. COB has an airtight alibi as he was at the IAS Gala in St. Hill with Tom Cruise.

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  5. Ps I had heard that Marc and David had opted to spend “quality time” (just like Debbie Cook did) with Heber. That skydiving sounds so much more “fun”,

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  6. Is there any possibility that Jenny may have just started trick-or-treating a little early?

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  7. Oh dear! I worry about all three of them. Accidents do happen!

    Not that I’m suggesting any of them are PTS or anything, but this radio silence is disconcerting.

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  8. Oh my, Dollar, please don’t worry. The highest ranking officials of the most ethical group on the planet couldn’t possibly be PTS.

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  9. “Miss Emotion”……….ha ha ha ha ………..you´re just too funny, OT8!!!

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  10. Did Mr. Yager ever get that much needed dental work and teeth whitening?

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