Church of Scientology ecclesiastical leader David Miscavige and North Korean leader Kim Jong Un today issued a joint global Christmas statement calling for a greater acceptance and tolerance of totalitarian regimes. “The […]
Church of Scientology Hires North Korea to Handle Media and Internet Problems
“North Korea’s success in confronting and shattering a suppressive movie by Sony was extremely impressive,” declared Scientology spokesman Ken Delusion. “And that is why we in the Church of Scientology have hired […]
How to get a convinced Scientologist on the road to donating more to the IAS!
How to get a convinced Scientologist on the road to donating more to the IAS! Stable Datum: All members of the Church of Scientology have a button on self importance, particularly OT’s […]
Gimme A David Miscavige Special!
Guy walks into a bar and says, “Gimme a David Miscavige Special!” The bartender takes all of the guy’s money and beats him to a bloody pulp. ***** Guy walks into a […]
Scientology Fleet Admiral David Miscavige in the RTC Bunker
Church of Scientology Financial Impact Accounts for 20% of Jobs in America
“The Church of Scientology’s financial impact accounts for 20% of all jobs in America,” Church spokesman Ken Delusion declared today by telex from the ship. “For example, our Ideal Org gas stations […]
Church of Scientology Leader David Miscavige Gives Texas a Gift!
“Church of Scientology Ecclesiastical Leader, His Imperial Holiness David Miscavige, today decreed that Oklahoma no longer exists,” announced Monsignor Ken Delusion. “In his infinite wisdom and beneficence, therefore, His Imperial Holiness David […]
Wog Talk — An Intercepted Conversation!
We in RTC have intercepted “wog talk” and are posting it here for intelligence purposes. This cables intercept is a clear indication that SP’s are plotting against us! Please make a heroic […]
COB Announces the Golden Age of Supremely Deluxe Ideal Orgs!
“‘Ideal’ is no longer good enough,” announced his Imperial Holiness Captain David Miscavige from atop his ecclesiastical warhorse Barnabas. Barnabas, whom Captain Miscavige recently appointed Executive Director International of the Church of […]
Church of Scientology Launches NGAFAY Campaign!
“In order to terminatedly handle wogs, haters, SP’s, and bitter defrocked apostates, we in the Church of Scientology have launched a massive PR offensive,” announced Church of Scientology spokesman Mr. Ken Delusion. […]
OTVIIIisGrrr8! 