Professor David Miscavige’s Miracle Cure!
Introduction to the Scientology Knowledge Report
Introduction to the Scientology Knowledge Report Issued by Captain Holotta Delusion, Inspector General Ethics, Religious Technology Center The Knowledge Report (KR) is designed to protect you and other Scientologists from receiving any […]
The Church of Scientology and Computer Hacking: The Facts
“What are the real facts about the Church of Scientology and computer hacking?” asked Dr. Frank Wonderman today during a special meeting to address recent scandalous allegations. “The facts are these: When […]
When Thetans Drove Chrysler’s
“1962. Except for a few Commies who had been sent in to cause trouble, everything was A-OK with Scientology. “Back then we all smoked Kools and drove great big ol’ Chrysler’s just […]
PUBLIC NOTICE: TORONTO SP CONFERENCE DECLARED AN ILLEGAL CRIMINAL ASSEMBLY
— TO BE READ ALOUD TO THE ILLEGALLY ASSEMBLED SP TORONTO CONFERENCE BY A DESIGNATED SP AUTHORITY— We in RTC have declared the SP Toronto Conference, or conclave, or whatever it is […]
Masturbatory Activities in the Church of Scientology Must Cease!
“Enormous amounts of present time masturbatory activities prevent the Church of Scientology from attaining forward progress,” declared WDC Chairman Dr. Frank Wonderman. “Instead of clearing the planet, public Scientologists are engaged in […]
Welcome to the Church of Scientology – Indoctrination for New Members
Welcome to the Church of Scientology. You have made a very wise decision to improve yourself through the use of our highly effective spiritual technology. An exciting spiritual adventure awaits. Our copyrighted […]
Vatican Selects Starbucks as the Official Coffee Kiosk of St. Peters
In global ecclesiastical news today, Vatican spokesman Bishop. M. Plant announced that Starbucks has been selected at the official coffee kiosk of St. Peters. “The new Starbucks is now open in the […]
Massive Stat Crash at Flag Land Base Threatens the Very Survival of Our Planet!
” An inky black darkness has descended upon the Flag Land Base,” declared Comrade Dr. Frank Wonderman, CO INT STAT CRASH INVESTIGATIONS UNIT. “My initial investigation has revealed that fully 84% of […]
