“A troubled Prince Andrew has turned to we in the Church of Scientology for help,” said spokesman Ken Delusion. “The Flag Case Supervisor has ordered the Prince to undergo 100 hours of […]
The latest technical research at Flag indicates that Scientologists are too overcharged to handle David Miscavige engrams in session. In 90% of cases, the e-meter blew up. The correct handling is to […]
Just as Trotskyite wreckers and diversionists were a threat to the worker’s revolution in Russia, so too are Psych wreckers and diversionists who traffick in reasonableness a threat to Scientology’s noble aim […]
It has been brought to our attention in RTC that Scientology OT’s are having articles about their involvement in Scientology deindexed (removed) from Google. This is a very BAD INDICATOR that means […]
After throwing a major ecclesiastical temper tantrum and rather dramatically screaming that his existing bedroom was too dark and depressing, David Miscavige demanded a new white bedroom. “I need white to match […]
After a nearly year-long manhunt, Scientology fugitive David Miscavige was arrested by the FBI in Las Vegas after being picked up by local police for a minor shoplifting incident. Las Vegas police […]
After an intense 48 hour manhunt and dragnet conducted by over 1,200 members of Scientology’s security forces, it has been determined that Tony Ortega was not in Clearwater. Nevertheless, the threat of […]
All Scientologists are like Schrödinger’s cat in the box: They are simultaneously in good standing and not in good standing with the Church. If a radioactive legal particle adverse to the Church […]
The movie opens with Sam the Scientologist, played by Tom Cruise, being ejected bodily from a saloon and hurled onto the dirty streets of Wogtown: Scene 2: The bad guy “Imonda Internet” […]
“The IAS is gripped by a dual disaster,” exclaimed Church spokesman Ken Delusion. “First, there is a vast oversupply of IAS status trophies. Indeed, IAS warehouses are holding a projected twenty-five year […]
OTVIIIisGrrr8! 