All Scientologists are like Schrödinger’s cat in the box: They are simultaneously in good standing and not in good standing with the Church. If a radioactive legal particle adverse to the Church […]
315 Pound Church of Scientology Justice Chief to be Fitness Boarded Out of Sea Org
As reported today by Psych journalist Tony Ortega today, Church of Scientology International Justice Chief Mike Ellis weighs 315 pounds. Ellis has an earache, bronchitis, high blood pressure, and heart problems. The […]
Scientology: Global Red Alert!
Fleet Admiral David Miscavige has declared a global red alert for all Scientology sectors following the Church’s legal loss in Florida. All Scientologists are hereby ordered to begin purchasing all copies of […]
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