We in RTC are ordering all Scientologists to buy at least 50 copies of this special new Book & Cassette package in time for the holidays! These vital new materials are guaranteed […]
The Church of Scientology Asks: Can We Ever Be Friends?
No You May Not Have a Copy of Your SP Declare
We in RTC are often badgered by bitter defrocked apostates for actual paper copies of their goldenrod declares. This will never happen so don’t even ask. We in RTC know the cunning […]
Church of Scientology Leader Applauds Duck Dynasty’s Homphobia
“We in the Church of Scientology applaud the anti-gay attitudes of Duck Dynasty star Phil Robertson,” said Church spokesman Ken Delusion. “Indeed,” Delusion noted, “1.1’s, or homosexuals, are not allowed in the […]
Church of Scientology Facing Critical Situations in South Africa
“The Church of Scientology faces critical situations in South Africa,” Church spokesman Ken Delusion announced today at a news conference. “As a result of these these very critical situations,” Delusion commented, “”COB […]
Church of Scientology Declared PTS to RTC
We in RTC have just declared the entire Church of Scientology PTS to RTC, this after the major statcrash in sales of the following: Basics GAT II services Ultra Mark VIII e-meters […]
David Miscavige, Pope of Scientology = POS
All heads of state have acronyms: * The Secret Service acronym for the President of the United States is POTUS. * The Church of Scientology acronym for the Pope of Scientology is […]
Urgent: Donate Now to the Pope David Miscavige Legal Defense Fund!
Speaking today from a packed news conference at the Howard Johnson’s in Comal County, Texas, Scientology spokesman Ken Delusion expressed the collective moral outrage of the world’s 12,000,000 Scientology parishioners. “In a […]
The Future of the Scientology Tent in Clearwater, Florida
COB RTC David Miscavige’s giant circus tent has served its epic, incredible, and planetary-changing destiny as the launching pad of GAT II. GAT II is now in highest ever affluence and is […]
Captain David Miscavige Targets SINO’s!
SINO! The mere sound of this filthy word brings a sneer to Captain Miscavige’s face. “Scientologists In Name Only disgust me,” Captain Miscavige said. “These people pay lip service to the Church […]
US Customs Officials Confuse New Scientology E-Meter for Easy Bake Oven
US Customs officials at the Port of Los Angeles last week ordered 250,000,000 new Scientology Mark VIII e-meters returned to China, this after mistaking the distinctive Scientology electropsychometer for the Hasbro Easy […]
OTVIIIisGrrr8! 