Drilling on the perceptics of smell and taste on Super Power is accomplished through the use of a large and modern self serve yogurt emporium. This well equipped facility includes a lounge, […]
John P. Capitalist and His Blog Declared a Suppressive Group!
RTC 15 November 2013 SUPPRESSIVE GROUP DECLARE JOHN P. CAPITALIST AND HIS BLOG John P. Capitalist and his criminally suppressive blog are hereby declared a Suppressive Group for their many HIGH CRIMES: […]
Super Fighter Tom Cruise Saves the Church of Scientology from Psychiatry!
We in the Church of Scientology wish to clear up a misconception in the media: Tom’s Cruise’s main job is not acting; he only acts to pay the bills. No, Tom Cruise’s […]
Church of Scientology Prepares to Launch Super Power and GAT II
Talk about Excitement! There is literally electricity in the air here at Flag Land Base as we prepare to implant blow people fifty feet out of their heads! We in RTC have […]
Launch of Super Power and GAT II to be World’s First “On the Cans Only” Event!
After months of extensive preparation, we in RTC can now announce that next week’s launch of Super Power and GAT II will be the world’s first “On the Cans Only” event. Each […]
Church of Scientology Armies Launch Surprise Attack on Clearwater!
At 0800 hours today, Church of Scientology armies stormed out of the Flag Ecclesiastical Pavilion and the Super Power Building whereupon they unleashed a massive surprise ground attack upon the City of […]
DAVID MISCAVIGE ORDERS: “#@&^* PICK UP THE PHONE WHEN WE CALL YOU FOR GAT II AND SUPER POWER!”
COB RTC David Miscavige is furious with Scientology parishioners for refusing to pick up their phones when Flag or their local Org calls them to confirm their attendance at the most important […]
Church of Scientology Now Selling Money Saving SP Declares!
Secret RTC studies have shown that 93% of Scientologists who reach OT VII are declared SP’s within three years of reaching this exalted state. This is a shocking datum! When surveyed, fully […]
New Scientology E-Meter Features Tube Technology
The new Mark CV E-Meter will be released this weekend at Flag Land Base by COB RTC David Miscavige. “The big reveal,” said Church of Scientology spokesman Ken Delusion, “is that the […]
New RTC Ecclesiastical Ruling: IAS Patron Status and Bridge Progress Invalid at Death
In a new ecclesiastical ruling handed down today from the Church of Scientology’s spiritual headquarters in Hemet, His Holiness Pope Miscavige, the leader of the Scientology religion, decreed that a Scientologist’s IAS […]
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