OSA Director of Internet Combat Killers (OSA DICK) Dr. Werner Von Strudeldorf sat at his desk and concluded his analysis of the latest datums. “There is no doubt about it,” Von Strudeldorf […]
OSA DICK
Church of Scientology Denies Involvement in Denny Hastert Scandal
“While it is true that former Speaker of the House Denny Hastert was a Scientologist who received hundreds of hours of Scientology auditing in the 1970’s,” said Church spokesman Ken Delusion, “it […]
“Peace and Prosperity are Just Around the Corner For We in the Church of Scientology”
“Peace and prosperity are just around the corner for we in the Church of Scientology,” said Chairman David Miscavige. “The forces of global psychiatric suppression are collapsing under the withering onslaught of […]
Captain David Miscavige’s New Book Now Available!
“Destined to become the definitive text for global ecclesiastical leaders everywhere, Captain David Miscavige’s The Art of Ecclesiastical Stage Design: A Study in Scientology Understatement offers vital data on how to drain […]
Tower of Scientology To House Criminal SP’s
“With record Scientology expansion comes record suppression,” said Church spokesman Ken Delusion, “and that is why Captain Miscavige had 24 additional stories added to the Superannuated Los Angeles Infinity Platinum Model Ideal […]
Captain David Miscavige’s Long Awaited Memoirs Now Available from Bridge Publications International
From the book: “Scientologist Tom Cruise trembled as he approached the golden glittering IAS stage to receive the highest medal ever given to anyone in Scientology.” “He was in the presence of […]
Scientology Fundraising in Action!
“You goddamn #*^&@#* SP! You call yourself an OT while you’re holding out on Scientology! Where’s the rest of your &*^(% money!” “You call $1,000 a donation?! You’re not even close! Hand […]
Scientology Pharmaceutical Billionaire Bob Duggan to Sell Sea Org Members
Scientology OT and billionaire Bob Duggan has the Midas touch. Having just made $3.55 billion dollars selling his pharmaceutical company Pharmacyclics to a wog drug company, Duggan realized just how much money […]
Tough New WDC Chairman to Smash in Ethics on the Church!
“What was needed,” said Church spokesman Comrade Dr. Frank Wonderman, “was a tough new Watch Dog Committee (WDC) Chairman to smash in ethics on Scientologists.” “Accordingly, the Board of Directors has appointed […]
Los Angeles Org Will Beat Any Advertised Clear Price!
OTVIIIisGrrr8! 