Alien Abduction Incident Report. January 1, 2022. 0632 Hours. Clearwater, Florida. As he walked the quiet early morning streets around Flag Land Base, Space Admiral David Miscavige was abducted by a marauding […]
Scientology’s “Occupy Clearwater” Nearing Its Final Goal of a Complete Takeover!
The Church of Scientology’s “Occupy Clearwater” is now in its 48th year. We in Scientology own vast swaths of Downtown Clearwater and aim to smash all opposition to a complete takeover. Our […]
Fleet Admiral David Miscavige Places All Florida Scientologists Into “Doubt” After Mark Bunker Wins Clearwater City Council Seat
Visibly shaken and enraged by Mark Bunker’s win in Clearwater, Fleet Admiral David Miscavige went live today on Scientology TV to berate all Floridian Scientologists for being theetie-wheetie dilettantes who allowed this […]
World Exclusive: NASA Rover Curiosity Discovers Ancient Cult Temple on Mars!
“While cresting the edge of the Gale crater on Mars, NASA’s Curiosity rover was suddenly presented with a stunning view of an ancient and deserted Cult temple on Mars!,” announced NASA astroarcheologist […]
Tom Cruise: Lost in Space — Part 1
Scientology OT VIII Tom Cruise was strapped into the super-secret RTC TR3-B hypersonic spaceplane. He had been scrambled aloft following yet another Marcabian incursion into the air space above Flag Land Base. […]
Scientology: We Now Own Downtown Clearwater!
“Our forces now own Downtown Clearwater!” enthused Scientology Land Führer Hermann Eichmann. “We will next proceed to sweep Clearwater clean of all SP’s!”
Get the SP!
Dad was driving the family’s Oldsmobile Vista-Cruiser when he spotted the SP in the crosswalk. Dad accelerated hard, and, with a hard-fixed Scientology glare, aimed the gleaming 5,000 pounds of Detroit steel […]
RTC Secret Galactic Interplanetary Memorandum
COB RTC David Miscavige — whose real galactic identity is Emperor Revoltingdrool of the Helotrobus Confederation — had promised the Marcabs a choice 1.4 acre site in Downtown Clearwater as a landing […]
David Miscavige Reacts to the Clearwater Marine Aquarium’s Refusal to sell Scientology the 1.4 Acre Parcel
Scientology to Sue City of Clearwater for Eleventy Billion Dollars!
The so-called “City of Clearwater” is a cynical wog legal fiction. Created and funded by Big Pharma only to torment, harass, and impede the progress of Scientology, Clearwater’s latest outrage occurred last […]