OTVIIIisGrrr8!
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Terror-Rama Dome in Hollywood Showing Psych-Funded Hate Film!
The Terror-Rama Dome theater in Hollywood is showing the Psych-Funded HBO film Going Clear: Scientology and the Prison of Belief. “Captain David Miscavige has ordered all 1,200,000,000 Scientologists in the Los Angeles […]
Captain Miscavige Orders the Nuclear Option Against HBO!
We in the Church of Scientology are under attack by the amassed global forces of planetary suppression. Captain David Miscavige is in his RTC War Room handling the dire threat posed by […]
KCET Rental Televisions: One-Channel RTC-Approved TV for Scientologists!
The KCET Rental Television receives only one RTC-approved broadcast channel: Scientology Media Productions. The KCET B&W Rental Television can be rented monthly for $1995. Rental color televisions are $2995 per month. The […]
Craigslist Ad
WM smoker into CoSplay wants to meet other WM smokers into CoSplay. Can host in Hollywood or Hemet. Must be into naval uniforms, wrestling, and drinking. No holds barred action. Call “Capt. […]
The Egress Rundown
“The new Egress Rundown is the ultimate recovery of lost tech that puts you in charge of your eternity!” gushed Flag spokesman Ken Delusion.” “Fully ninety-dimensional and epic, the Egress Rundown is […]
Statcrash in the Cathedral
“Flag Land Base has gone criminal!” declared Senior International Ecclesiastical Sec Checker and Interim IJC Captain Davis Jackinov. “Fleet Admiral Miscavige entrusted Flag to forward command intention with our new 21st century […]
Why Scientology Costs So Much Money
“We in the Church of Scientology wish to point out that planets don’t clear themselves,” declared Church spokesman Ken Delusion. “Clearing costs money as do Ideal Orgs, dissemination centers, hyperbaric implanting chambers, […]
New and Easier “Sec Checks Lite” Feature 50% Less Brutality!
“Captain David Miscavige is inviting you to drop by your nearest Ideal Org to experience the new Sec Check Lite!” enthused Church spokesman Ken Delusion. “Designed by RTC to handle your crimes […]
COB RTC David Miscavige Finds the Lost Tech of Arbitration!
In an ecclesiastical miracle for the ages, COB RTC Mr. David Miscavige has just found the LOST TECH OF ARBITRATION. Written by the Founder in 1982, this lost tech proves that arbitration […]
OTVIIIisGrrr8! 