“New research by the Scientology Bureau of Science has shown that airborne BT’s have increased 4,000% due to increased volcanic activity in the world,” announced Flag folder page Bixby Schoenborn. “For this […]
From BT’s to lava flows, volcanoes have been the bane of Scientology’s existence for 75 million years!
“From BT’s to lava flows, volcanoes have been the bane of Scientology’s existence for 75 million years.” — Dr. Ken Delusion, Nuclear Physicist. “So long as the MEST Universe, volcanoes, Targs, Marcabian Implanters, […]
National Geographic Seeks to Destroy the World!
National Geographic is selling what appears to be an innocent scientific experiment for young people. “Build Your Own Volcano” the box declares as it lures young people to disaster! The reality of […]
Church of Scientology Sues QAnon for Infringing Its Copyrights on Selling Fear & Conspiracy Porn
“We in the Church of Scientology are furious with QAnon!” roared Ken Delusion. “Selling paranoia and fear and implaning people is Scientology’s core business market,” Delusion emphasized. “QAnon has no goddamned business trying to cut into our lucrative Fear and Porn market.
COVID-19 is Killing Vampires at an Alarming Rate!
“COVID-19 is killing vampires at an alarming rate,” warned Dr. Ken Delusion. “And this includes the vampires who work as Scientology regges.” “Vampires drink infected blood and they die. And when vampires […]
Secret Details of the Recent OSA Conspiracy Congress Meeting
“Scientology needs a new and better central conspiracy theory!” exclaimed Cult Leader Miscavige. “Our current story of Xenu capturing everyone, throwing them into volcanoes, and nuking them can’t possibly compete with the […]
Scientology Outsources Part of Its Heavy Workload to the Catholic Church
“Due to the highest ever straight up and vertical expansion resulting from Scientology TV, Scientology is now outsourcing some of its BT exorcism workload to the Catholic Church,” said spokesman Ken Delusion. […]
Scientology TV Airs a 75,000,000 Year Old Photograph!
Scientology TV: Here we have a 75,000,000 year old photo showing the bomb bay of one of Xenu’s DC-8 spaceplanes. The gold boxes contain frozen humanoids ready for aerodynamic insertion into the […]
Hillary Completes OT III at Flag!
Hillary had problems at Flag with the OT III materials, but once we handled her crashing misunderstood on BT’s she F/N’d and attested to having completed the level.
Scientific Evidence of BT’s Discovered!
Scientology researcher Dr. Kool de Menthol today announced an historic, epic, and planetary-changing scientific breakthrough that conclusively proves the claim of Scientology: There are body thetans surrounding the host thetan. Ordered by […]