Mike Rinder Leaks Details of Scientology TV’s Entire Third Season!

We in RTC vehemently object to Mike Rinder leaking details of Season Three of Scientology TV. Now we know why Mike keeps an SR-71 spy plane. Our sources reliably inform us that […]
Scientology TV is not Unwatchable Propaganda!

VP Scientology TV Mr. Ken Delusion sat at his big desk and glared out the window at Sunset Blvd. He had just read entheta online. “Unwatchable Propaganda!” he screamed at the wog […]
Scientology TV’s New Reality Show: On the Road With Dave!

Scientology TV’s new reality show is called On the Road with Dave. Starring COB RTC Mr. David Miscavige, the show follows Dave around as he tours Ideal Orgs and talks to ordinary […]
David Miscavige Fires Everyone Working at Scientology TV!

Complaining that there was not enough gold ornamentation on his stage set and that the video lacked color saturation, David Miscavige today fired everyone who worked for Scientology TV. “COB is very […]
Travolta Marathon on Scientology TV This Weekend!

“Widely savaged by wog film critics as the worst mobster film ever, John Travolta’s Gotti has been yanked from theaters and will be released tomorrow on Scientology TV,” announced Ken Delusion, the […]
Scientology Outsources Part of Its Heavy Workload to the Catholic Church
“Due to the highest ever straight up and vertical expansion resulting from Scientology TV, Scientology is now outsourcing some of its BT exorcism workload to the Catholic Church,” said spokesman Ken Delusion. […]
Meet a Scientologist: Thorsten Von Overgaard Handling Overpopulation by Selling Bags Made from Human Babies!

Scientologists care about global problems such as pollution, drugs, and overpopulation. And that is why Scientologist Thorsten Von Overgaard is selling a line of designer bags made from human babies. “We harvest […]
Scientology TV Features World’s First OTX Completion!

We in RTC are pleased to announced that Marshall Herff Applewhite, leader of the Heaven’s Gate Church, is the world’s first OTX completion. When asked by Scientology TV to comment, Applewhite enthused, […]
Trump Lawyer Michael Cohen Turns to Scientology for Help!

“We in the Church of Scientology know what it’s like to be the victim of a massive and unconstitutional raid by US Federal agents. This happened to us in 1977 when hundreds […]