MARS CENTRAL COMMAND
PSYCHIATRIC IMPLANTING UNIT
CONFIDENTIAL: BURN AFTER READING
Summary: Our drone flyover of the Ventura Ideal Org grand opening showed <2,000 Scientologists remaining in the Southern California Region of Teegeeack. The population of SoCal is 24 million; we are therefore dealing with a very minute fraction of Scientologists to implant.
Deployment: On the morning of 1 March 2020, Squadron 47 will deploy from Mars Spaceport 9 and head for Teegeeack. Flight time is eight hours; this includes a stop at Lunar Base 2 to deliver third rail porcelain insulators for the new electrical subway line on Armstrong Blvd.
Tasking Orders: Implant SoCal Scientologists using our Tesla charged-neuron-coupling 5G technology.
Subliminal Implanting Messages:
It’s okay to take a peek at the internet and see what it says about Scientology.
My church is ripping me off.
David Miscavige is a squirrel and has squirreled LRH’s Tech.
I need to escape from the Sea Org now.
My church is lying to me.
I don’t have any money left and yet the regges refuse to leave me alone.
The other 22 new and highly effective implanting messages are preloaded and ready for broadcast when Squadron 47 reaches Pac Base on the evening of 1 March 2020.
Categories: OTVIIIisGrrr8!
OTVIIIisGrrr8! 
Will the “Tesla charged-neuron-coupling 5G technology” be delivered via Scientology TV as we become a bit anaten due to the repetitive nature of the programming or will it be delivered in our mega-vitamin/Cal-Mag/All-Blend-Oil cocktail when we once again re-do the Purification Rundown?
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The Tesla charged-neuron-coupling 5G technology is already being delivered multimodally over many vias including Scientology TV.
The older GAT II implanting technology quit working as it lost signal intensity. Likewise, the SRD implanting technology is breaking down due to continual transmission failures in the Delta Node Network antennas.
This new 5G is the real shit. Just wait til it kicks in.
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MARS SECTOR 6 CALLING +++ UNACCEPTABLE +++ NEEM NEEM TWO SIX EIGHT TWO EIGHT THIS PATTERN +++ EIGHT SEVEN TOTALLY ENCLOSED IN THIS PATTERN NIM NIM +++ NO MENTION IS MADE OF SATELLITE 3 +++ HRH DOCTOR GEORGE KING THE VOICE OF INTERPLANETARY PARLIAMENT +++ SATELLITE 9999 +++ SAINT GOO-LING +++ OR THE AETHERIUS SOCIETY +++ THEREFORE THIS COMMUNICATION MUST BE DEEMED UNACCEPTABLE +++ THE MAGNETIC FLUX IN THIS AREA IS NIM NIM EIGHT SEVEN EIGHT TWO EIGHT NEEM NEEM +++ MARS SECTOR SIX OVER AND OUT +++ P.S. RON SAYS HI FROM TARGET 2 +++
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DR. STRABISMUS OF UTRECHT ++++ WE’RE TRAPPED IN AN INTERDIMENSIONAL PHONE BOOTH ON MARS ++++ PLEASE SEND HELP +++++ THERE IS A BOX OF MONEY UNDER COB’S BED TO PAY FOR THE RESCUE ++++ SEND EXTRA SCOTCH SOONEST. OUT.
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Your talents are wasted, I love your Twitter feed, just started to read it.
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Tell me Jeffrey, how do we put in a petition to change L. Ron Hubbard Way to
Xenu’s Body-Thetans Exorcism Way
?
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