From the book:
“Scientologist Tom Cruise trembled as he approached the golden glittering IAS stage to receive the highest medal ever given to anyone in Scientology.”
“He was in the presence of greatness.”
“That greatness was me.”
The Miracles of OT Marketing to Sheeple: How to sell Scientologists the same products year in and year out for 65 years and counting!
Golden shovels lead to Ideal Orgs! How to raise money endlessly for decades using empty old dilapidated buildings!
Captain Miscavige’s pro tips for handling troublesome celebrities!
“I kissed a man and I liked it!” How Captain Miscavige and the Church of Scientology profit from celebrity secrets!
July 8, 2015: Will Captain Miscavige be able to prevent the planned Mass Marcab landing?
Categories: OTVIIIisGrrr8!
OTVIIIisGrrr8! 
Wait a minute, we’re confused…we thought the high priced Scientology lawyers established no one refers to him as Captain…
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No one is allowed to refer to Captain Miscavige as Captain Miscavige in any court of law or legal proceeding. Outside of legal venues all persons must refer to Captain Miscavige as Captain Miscavige.
We in RTC hopes this clarifies the protocol of when and when not to refer to Captain Miscavige as Captain Miscavige.
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That excerpt is just wonderful. And I’m sure that the entire book is one long golden shower of COB’s priceless wisdom!
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Well that’s certainly one way to describe the book.
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How many pages does he dedicate to his marriage with Shelly?
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Captain Miscavige never had a first wife.
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At last, a refreshing and totally unbiased account of a brilliant but humble global religious leader.
Sadly, the fascinating stories of Captain Miscavige’s heroic naval career have been removed, no doubt for reasons of national security, but his name is still whispered with fear and respect in the shady pirate infested bars of Curaçao and Aruba where his missions aboard the SS Freewinds ensured the safety of travelers in the Caribbean.
Andrew
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Has Jenna Elfman been selected to portray Captain Miscavige in the movie version or is she too tall?
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LRH had many accomplishments (invented the dictionary, discovered a minute atomic particle at Cal Tech, etc.) Didn’t COB assist him in his previous lives?
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Before he assumed the meat body he uses this lifetime named David Miscavige, the big being David Miscavige created the lesser being LRH. David Miscavige then created LRH having a series of unsolvable problems that only David Miscavige could solve.
Creating LRH allowed David Miscavige to have a big game called “fixing Ron’s mistakes.”
David Miscavige actually created Scientology by creating LRH and allowing LRH to create an overt product that David Miscavige would have to solve all against all odds, thus proving that David Miscavige is a bigger being than LRH could ever be.
David Miscavige is the true Source, Founder, and Creator of Scientology.
David Miscavige saved Scientology by solving the problems created by LRH.
Scientology is flourishing and prospering thanks to David Miscavige saving it from the overts, problems, withholds and criminality of LRH and the GO.
Scientology is an era of straight up and vertical expansion thanks to global ecclesiastical leader David Miscavige.
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Who created David Miscavige?
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David Miscavige was created seventy-six trillion years ago in a far away galaxy. He was created in a high energy particle accelerator (7000 TeV) by German nuclear physicists who accelerated gluons to .99995 the speed of light. The resultant collision with insanity particles created David Miscavige. He is literally glued to insanity. We want you to get this as a scientific fact.
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I´m just so happy that all is well with Scientology and our great beloved leader. And I´m thankful that we continue to have OTVIII patiently explain the unexplainable to us all thus keeping us up to date with all things important regarding our religion.
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